I hope John Roberts can't watch the NFL playoff games today because he has explosive diarrhea.
-
I hope John Roberts needs to hop a quick flight to New York today to give a lecture but never got a Real ID so he's stopped by TSA before boarding and okay whatever he pays the $45 fee for TSA to confirm his identity online but they've started using an AI for that and the AI somehow conflates Chief Justice of the Supreme Court with Iran's Supreme Leader of the Council of Experts and he's arrested and held for three days in a DHS facility in, ironically, New York before someone finally figures it out.
I hope John Roberts is feeling pretty good this morning as he sits at his kitchen table sipping coffee and scanning the day's news, until he sees this story that public confidence in the Supreme Court is at all all-time low and he goes from feeling pretty good to wanting to crawl back in bed. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/supreme-court/poll-confidence-supreme-court-drops-record-low-rcna262459
-
@boelder Yeah, but they still care about their legacies. Not shame but ego.
-
I hope John Roberts is feeling pretty good this morning as he sits at his kitchen table sipping coffee and scanning the day's news, until he sees this story that public confidence in the Supreme Court is at all all-time low and he goes from feeling pretty good to wanting to crawl back in bed. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/supreme-court/poll-confidence-supreme-court-drops-record-low-rcna262459
I hope John Roberts has a tickly stray hair but every time he smooths the hair back on his temples that tickly hair doesn't go away and he finally looks in a mirror and realizes he has a single 3-inch long twisty thick dark hair growing right out of the forward edge of his actual ear, and he successfully plucks it but spends the rest of the day having troubling thoughts about aging and mortality.
-
I hope John Roberts has a tickly stray hair but every time he smooths the hair back on his temples that tickly hair doesn't go away and he finally looks in a mirror and realizes he has a single 3-inch long twisty thick dark hair growing right out of the forward edge of his actual ear, and he successfully plucks it but spends the rest of the day having troubling thoughts about aging and mortality.
(What, are some of my John Roberts curses inspired by incidents in my personal life? Why ever would you think that?)
-
@ermo _/\_
-
(What, are some of my John Roberts curses inspired by incidents in my personal life? Why ever would you think that?)
I hope today it burns when John Roberts pees.
-
I hope today it burns when John Roberts pees.
I hope today it still burns when John Roberts pees, just like yesterday only a little worse, and he's starting to worry that maybe it's not just that he got some soap up there or something.
-
I hope today it still burns when John Roberts pees, just like yesterday only a little worse, and he's starting to worry that maybe it's not just that he got some soap up there or something.
I hope that today, yikes, it burns *again* when John Roberts pees, for the third day in a row, and he finally mentions it to his wife, which is a mistake because she later notices that it burns a little when she pees, too, and she privately messages her concierge gynecologist for an appointment and when they go to their Catholic church this morning she gives him a questioning, slightly accusatory look as he enters the confessional.
-
I hope that today, yikes, it burns *again* when John Roberts pees, for the third day in a row, and he finally mentions it to his wife, which is a mistake because she later notices that it burns a little when she pees, too, and she privately messages her concierge gynecologist for an appointment and when they go to their Catholic church this morning she gives him a questioning, slightly accusatory look as he enters the confessional.
I hope that today John Roberts' wife goes to her expensive concierge gynecologist and gets tested for the burning she and the Chief Justice have been experiencing, and she gets good news and bad news: no it's not an STI, so in his case it actually probably is the new soap she bought – but also she has developed an allergy to his semen, meaning they either need to give up intercourse or return to using condoms, which they haven't had to do for years and which anyway are banned by their church. Hmmm, she thinks. Decisions, decisions...
-
I hope that today John Roberts' wife goes to her expensive concierge gynecologist and gets tested for the burning she and the Chief Justice have been experiencing, and she gets good news and bad news: no it's not an STI, so in his case it actually probably is the new soap she bought – but also she has developed an allergy to his semen, meaning they either need to give up intercourse or return to using condoms, which they haven't had to do for years and which anyway are banned by their church. Hmmm, she thinks. Decisions, decisions...
I hope that last night John Roberts had his first erotic dream in a long time and it was super realistic and intense and pleasurable but the person he was with in the dream was Brett Kavanaugh who at one point sort of transformed into Clarence Thomas and then it was the three of them together and so all day today he feels sort of awkward around Brett and Clarence.
-
I hope that last night John Roberts had his first erotic dream in a long time and it was super realistic and intense and pleasurable but the person he was with in the dream was Brett Kavanaugh who at one point sort of transformed into Clarence Thomas and then it was the three of them together and so all day today he feels sort of awkward around Brett and Clarence.
It seems someone has found this thread
-
It seems someone has found this thread
@icastico Ha! Man, I dream of Roberts somehow stumbling across it one day and realizing that, no, he is not above it all.
-
@sarae He's pretty good on Indian law. Not sure what else.
-
@sarae He's pretty good on Indian law. Not sure what else.
Isn’t that Gorsuch?
-
Isn’t that Gorsuch?
-
I hope that last night John Roberts had his first erotic dream in a long time and it was super realistic and intense and pleasurable but the person he was with in the dream was Brett Kavanaugh who at one point sort of transformed into Clarence Thomas and then it was the three of them together and so all day today he feels sort of awkward around Brett and Clarence.
I hope that John Roberts went for a nice preprandial walk before dinner this evening and he thought he dressed warmly enough but halfway out he realized he hadn't and so began walking more briskly which yes made him a little warmer but after he was back home he realized his right hip was hurting because he had aggravated his bursitis and so tonight he has trouble sleeping because he's a side sleeper but the point of his hip is too painful so he has to sleep on his back which makes him snore and in the morning he's still fatigued and has a sore throat.
-
I hope that John Roberts went for a nice preprandial walk before dinner this evening and he thought he dressed warmly enough but halfway out he realized he hadn't and so began walking more briskly which yes made him a little warmer but after he was back home he realized his right hip was hurting because he had aggravated his bursitis and so tonight he has trouble sleeping because he's a side sleeper but the point of his hip is too painful so he has to sleep on his back which makes him snore and in the morning he's still fatigued and has a sore throat.
Today I hope John Roberts' hip still hurts and his throat is still sore, and that he's giving a speech to the Federalist Society tonight and has to take a long walk and then up stairs to the podium which aggravates his hip and the amplification isn't very good so he has to try to speak loudly and he's really uncomfortable and the crowd isn't very impressed with him because his gimpy limp and faint voice make him seem weak, which is never a good look among fascists.
-
@reijomancer ,_/\_
My hope is that the cumulative effect of small daily insults immediately will drive him off the cliff. -
Today I hope John Roberts' hip still hurts and his throat is still sore, and that he's giving a speech to the Federalist Society tonight and has to take a long walk and then up stairs to the podium which aggravates his hip and the amplification isn't very good so he has to try to speak loudly and he's really uncomfortable and the crowd isn't very impressed with him because his gimpy limp and faint voice make him seem weak, which is never a good look among fascists.
I hope John Roberts really admired Chuck Norris and is sad today.
-
I hope John Roberts really admired Chuck Norris and is sad today.
Today because it's 68° and sunny in DC I hope John Roberts goes for a walk to see the cherry blossoms but they're not quite open yet and he knows he's really busy for the next 2-3 weeks and won't be able to make time to come see them at their peak and that makes him sad.
