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  3. It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

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  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

    It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

    Humans? Legendary assholes.
    Dolphins? Assholes.
    Cats are notorious for being jerks.

    Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

    What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

    Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

    johns_priv@mastodon.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
    johns_priv@mastodon.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
    johns_priv@mastodon.social
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #138

    @alice Otters, don't search what they do unless you want to end traumatized

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    • dukeduke@mastodon.socialD dukeduke@mastodon.social

      @alice Canadian geeseholes have to be top 5.

      (video source unknown)

      xs4me2@mastodon.socialX This user is from outside of this forum
      xs4me2@mastodon.socialX This user is from outside of this forum
      xs4me2@mastodon.social
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #139

      @DukeDuke @alice

      The birds...

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      • river@lgbtqia.spaceR river@lgbtqia.space

        @alice oh wait, is this not a post about how humans have pretty butts?

        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
        alice@lgbtqia.space
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #140

        @river "legendary asshole"

        "Thanks, I take a lot of stairs"

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        • minego@pdx.socialM minego@pdx.social

          @alice It takes a brain to be an asshole.

          I mean, no one calls a lion an asshole for killing a zebra. That's just survival. A lion doesn't know how to be an asshole.

          I think you're absolutely right, but the same animals have the capacity to be selfless and caring.

          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
          alice@lgbtqia.space
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #141

          @minego lions are related to cats, they total know how to be assholes 😋

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          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

            It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

            Humans? Legendary assholes.
            Dolphins? Assholes.
            Cats are notorious for being jerks.

            Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

            What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

            Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

            mad_x@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
            mad_x@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
            mad_x@mastodon.social
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #142

            @alice peacock mantis shrimp can be a real asshole as fat as I know

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            • joscelyntransient@chaosfem.twJ joscelyntransient@chaosfem.tw

              @alice @bielsubob 🤣 🤣 🤣

              I really love the image of the goose pecking at Alice, and then they just slap the goose upside the face and it looks confused and offended.

              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
              alice@lgbtqia.space
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #143

              @JoscelynTransient that is exactly what happened. It chomped me, I reflexively slapped it, we both looked shocked, then started yelling at each other until the goose fucked off into the water.

              The ducks were all like "WTF was that about??"

              @bielsubob

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              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

                Humans? Legendary assholes.
                Dolphins? Assholes.
                Cats are notorious for being jerks.

                Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

                What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

                Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

                lyrial@transfem.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                lyrial@transfem.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                lyrial@transfem.social
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #144

                @alice@lgbtqia.space The answer here is simple; cats. They are all, as a family (Felidae) assholes. Every single one of them. Sure, they're cute, but they are murderous and want nothing more than to bother you, eat you, or remove things from your counter.

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                • syntaxseed@phpc.socialS syntaxseed@phpc.social

                  @alice Funny you ask this. We have two Guinea Pigs. They're sisters. Both cute as heck and dumb as rocks. But one is a real jerk. Bullies her sister, nips at fingers, steals food.

                  The bonus fact is - it used to be the other way around. When they were young the other sister was the jerk. One aged into a sweetheart & the other into a crotchety grump. 🤣

                  So attitude is fluid among #GuineaPigs apparently.

                  (Photo is Kaysah - the nice one.)

                  mad_x@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                  mad_x@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                  mad_x@mastodon.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #145

                  @syntaxseed @alice awww! I consider gunea pigs the peak of evolution (besides my dog). A perfect organism. There's not a single evil cell in their bodies. They are pure goodness.

                  Until they aren't, apparently

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • drude@literatur.socialD drude@literatur.social

                    @pascaldragon @alice

                    We have a plum tree that attracts wasps and hornets and we had no trouble at all so far. But maybe the plums make them peaceful so that they don't mind any humans around. (And also Europe.)

                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.space
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #146

                    @Drude @pascaldragon maybe it's just American hornets that are absolute shitweasels 🤷🏼‍♀️

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                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                      It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

                      Humans? Legendary assholes.
                      Dolphins? Assholes.
                      Cats are notorious for being jerks.

                      Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

                      What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

                      Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

                      simonzerafa@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
                      simonzerafa@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
                      simonzerafa@infosec.exchange
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #147

                      @alice

                      I wonder if Octopuses have their cranky and contrarian individuals? 🙂🤷‍♂️🐙

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                      0
                      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                        It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

                        Humans? Legendary assholes.
                        Dolphins? Assholes.
                        Cats are notorious for being jerks.

                        Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

                        What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

                        Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

                        redravenspirit@fedimedi.comR This user is from outside of this forum
                        redravenspirit@fedimedi.comR This user is from outside of this forum
                        redravenspirit@fedimedi.com
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #148

                        @alice we post goats, they can be nice and all, but there is always some a****le that keeps trying to headbutt...

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                        • jqmcd@sfba.socialJ jqmcd@sfba.social

                          @JoscelynTransient @alice Spiders are awesome, I love ‘em. But they can keep coming at you, like little assholes…

                          spiegelmama@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
                          spiegelmama@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
                          spiegelmama@infosec.exchange
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #149

                          @jqmcd I once had a cute little jumping spider sidle onto my desk, pause, then run up and bite my arm. I didn't even know those little ladies could bite humans, but I had an itchy welt there. I still have a fairly good attitude toward spiders, but that one in particular was kind of an asshole.
                          @JoscelynTransient @alice

                          ddr@pony.socialD 1 Reply Last reply
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                          • spiegelmama@infosec.exchangeS spiegelmama@infosec.exchange

                            @jqmcd I once had a cute little jumping spider sidle onto my desk, pause, then run up and bite my arm. I didn't even know those little ladies could bite humans, but I had an itchy welt there. I still have a fairly good attitude toward spiders, but that one in particular was kind of an asshole.
                            @JoscelynTransient @alice

                            ddr@pony.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
                            ddr@pony.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
                            ddr@pony.social
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #150

                            Oh man! Those things are smart enough to know what they're doing. What an absolutely ballsy prick you ran into, @spiegelmama!

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                            • jwcph@helvede.netJ jwcph@helvede.net shared this topic
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