oh no I had the thought that the US/UK "special relationship" is just the UK being Morty to the US's Rick and now I can't stop imaging their dialogues

[taweret@timeloop.cafe]

oh no I had the thought that the US/UK "special relationship" is just the UK being Morty to the US's Rick and now I can't stop imaging their dialogues

[taweret@timeloop.cafe]

rick (us): morty, morty, morty, get in the cruiser, we're going to iraq

morty (uk): i dont know rick,a million people are protesting. the evidence looks fake

rick: morty, dont be dramatic. i need you for coalition optics.youre my little buddy, morty. get in the ship

morty: oh geez rick

[taweret@timeloop.cafe]

morty: rick do i actually control my nukes?

rick: (laughs so hard he spills whatever that flask is)

morty: rick?

rick: sure morty, sure. you totally, absolutely control your nukes

morty: really?

rick: yeah, as long as you dont need missile maintenance, targeting updates, or, yknow, the missiles

morty: rick

rick: morty, just call them independent. if it makes you feel better

[taweret@timeloop.cafe]

oh no these write themselves

[taweret@timeloop.cafe]

morty: rick, why do you have thirteen military bases in my house

rick: security, morty. protection

morty: okay but how many bases do i have in your house

rick: morty are you out of your mind? a foreign military operating on american soil? do you know how insane that sounds?

morty: but

rick: that's completely different morty. we're protecting you. you don't need to protect us. we're us

morty: that doesn't-

rick: morty i have ten thousand troops in your country and a surveillance base in yorkshire that you're not allowedto ask questions about. this is what friendship looks like

morty: oh jeez

[taweret@timeloop.cafe]

rick: i'm taking venezuela morty!

morty: you're- you can't just TAKE a country rick

rick: i just did morty. i did it at 2am. it's done. their president's on my boat

morty: you KIDNAPPED a president?

rick: (burp) extradited, morty. different word. sounds more (burp) legal