Sometimes it's hard not to be reactive in the replies.
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Sometimes it's hard not to be reactive in the replies.
Women get reply guys all the time. In real life & online.
Some have more patience than others. For me, repeated abuse throughout my lifetime has made my skin thinner, not thicker.
So when ppl offer unsolicited advice, or when I don't mention every possible permutation of something up front...if ppl act as if that means I'm ignorant of it or think it unimportant, I can have a reaction that may seem out of proportion to the reply.
But that's because this is cumulative. For people marginalized in one or more ways, in person and online, replies happen against a background of genuinely having one's expertise & work disrespected regularly.
So if you think you're getting blasted without having earned it, it's possible you're right. Maybe. But when replying to marginalized people here, think about that mountain of reply guy stuff first and whether you want to be mistaken for the reply guy that started an avalanche. #9ReplyGuys
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B bogwitch@social.data.coop shared this topic
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Sometimes it's hard not to be reactive in the replies.
Women get reply guys all the time. In real life & online.
Some have more patience than others. For me, repeated abuse throughout my lifetime has made my skin thinner, not thicker.
So when ppl offer unsolicited advice, or when I don't mention every possible permutation of something up front...if ppl act as if that means I'm ignorant of it or think it unimportant, I can have a reaction that may seem out of proportion to the reply.
But that's because this is cumulative. For people marginalized in one or more ways, in person and online, replies happen against a background of genuinely having one's expertise & work disrespected regularly.
So if you think you're getting blasted without having earned it, it's possible you're right. Maybe. But when replying to marginalized people here, think about that mountain of reply guy stuff first and whether you want to be mistaken for the reply guy that started an avalanche. #9ReplyGuys
@meganL I'd like to live in a world where being an asshole to other people isn't so common that posts like this one need to exist.
Sorry people have been shitty to you so routinely.
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Sometimes it's hard not to be reactive in the replies.
Women get reply guys all the time. In real life & online.
Some have more patience than others. For me, repeated abuse throughout my lifetime has made my skin thinner, not thicker.
So when ppl offer unsolicited advice, or when I don't mention every possible permutation of something up front...if ppl act as if that means I'm ignorant of it or think it unimportant, I can have a reaction that may seem out of proportion to the reply.
But that's because this is cumulative. For people marginalized in one or more ways, in person and online, replies happen against a background of genuinely having one's expertise & work disrespected regularly.
So if you think you're getting blasted without having earned it, it's possible you're right. Maybe. But when replying to marginalized people here, think about that mountain of reply guy stuff first and whether you want to be mistaken for the reply guy that started an avalanche. #9ReplyGuys
@meganL not quite the same but still: Danish singer songwriter Annika Aakjær (IIRC) likened sexual harassment in the Danish Music industry to mosquito bites. "One you can brush off, a thousand drives you mad." (Speaking about micro aggressions and harassing comments.)
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@meganL not quite the same but still: Danish singer songwriter Annika Aakjær (IIRC) likened sexual harassment in the Danish Music industry to mosquito bites. "One you can brush off, a thousand drives you mad." (Speaking about micro aggressions and harassing comments.)
@Laust It's a good analogy.
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M malte@radikal.social shared this topic
