Cowboy space's application for stupidly ridiculous numbers of ludicrously large and probably impossible orbital "AI data centers" was SO BAD that the FCC asked them for loads of info.
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Cowboy space's application for stupidly ridiculous numbers of ludicrously large and probably impossible orbital "AI data centers" was SO BAD that the FCC asked them for loads of info. Which apparently they didn't provide by the deadline. Shucks. https://satnews.com/2026/09/13/the-fcc-asked-cowboy-space-how-big-its-satellites-are/
(Too bad 4 other companies have done the same fucking thing and the FCC hasn't stopped them)
@sundogplanets can we also please start talking about how *totally fucking absurd* a "Mars Colony" is as a general idea? Hey, who wants to live in an underground cave for the rest of your life?
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@sundogplanets can we also please start talking about how *totally fucking absurd* a "Mars Colony" is as a general idea? Hey, who wants to live in an underground cave for the rest of your life?
@slacy I have been, and I will continue to! You should read "A City on Mars" you would like it.
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Cowboy space's application for stupidly ridiculous numbers of ludicrously large and probably impossible orbital "AI data centers" was SO BAD that the FCC asked them for loads of info. Which apparently they didn't provide by the deadline. Shucks. https://satnews.com/2026/09/13/the-fcc-asked-cowboy-space-how-big-its-satellites-are/
(Too bad 4 other companies have done the same fucking thing and the FCC hasn't stopped them)
@sundogplanets …they’re trying to make more of the Bullshit Machines and they got knocked out by the clock instead of submitting bullshit?
SURELY THIS ISN’T INDICATIVE OF ANYTHING
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Cowboy space's application for stupidly ridiculous numbers of ludicrously large and probably impossible orbital "AI data centers" was SO BAD that the FCC asked them for loads of info. Which apparently they didn't provide by the deadline. Shucks. https://satnews.com/2026/09/13/the-fcc-asked-cowboy-space-how-big-its-satellites-are/
(Too bad 4 other companies have done the same fucking thing and the FCC hasn't stopped them)
Apparently the FCC gave Cowboy a one week extension for free. Because they all fucking suck.
But I am slightly enjoying imagining how things must be going at Cowboy. They have to design their fucking ridiculous physically impossible spacecraft (that they specifically said in the FCC filing hasn't been designed yet) in the next week. Good luck, dipshits!
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Apparently the FCC gave Cowboy a one week extension for free. Because they all fucking suck.
But I am slightly enjoying imagining how things must be going at Cowboy. They have to design their fucking ridiculous physically impossible spacecraft (that they specifically said in the FCC filing hasn't been designed yet) in the next week. Good luck, dipshits!
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Apparently the FCC gave Cowboy a one week extension for free. Because they all fucking suck.
But I am slightly enjoying imagining how things must be going at Cowboy. They have to design their fucking ridiculous physically impossible spacecraft (that they specifically said in the FCC filing hasn't been designed yet) in the next week. Good luck, dipshits!
Now I want that as a sticker: "Good luck, dipshits!" It's one of my very favorite non-gendered pejorative words.

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Apparently the FCC gave Cowboy a one week extension for free. Because they all fucking suck.
But I am slightly enjoying imagining how things must be going at Cowboy. They have to design their fucking ridiculous physically impossible spacecraft (that they specifically said in the FCC filing hasn't been designed yet) in the next week. Good luck, dipshits!
If anyone happens to have assembly drawings for an industrial walk-in freezer, he/she can probably sell the design to Cowboy for $50mil or so. Or plans for a suburban electric substation. Even sketches of a microwave relay tower might work. Or (best) a photo of a large PV array with goats grazing underneath.
It's unlikely that the "regulators" in the current Administration would be able to tell that the plans are for something other than an orbiting solar power plant.
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If anyone happens to have assembly drawings for an industrial walk-in freezer, he/she can probably sell the design to Cowboy for $50mil or so. Or plans for a suburban electric substation. Even sketches of a microwave relay tower might work. Or (best) a photo of a large PV array with goats grazing underneath.
It's unlikely that the "regulators" in the current Administration would be able to tell that the plans are for something other than an orbiting solar power plant.
@oldclumsy_nowmad @sundogplanets we could assume they'll go full circle and just generate the pictures and proposal with AI.
But that would just make me sad.
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Apparently the FCC gave Cowboy a one week extension for free. Because they all fucking suck.
But I am slightly enjoying imagining how things must be going at Cowboy. They have to design their fucking ridiculous physically impossible spacecraft (that they specifically said in the FCC filing hasn't been designed yet) in the next week. Good luck, dipshits!
@sundogplanets Hate to say it but the LLMs can do CAD now; it’s way easier for unscrupulous people to fake something to look “real enough” that it was even a year ago.
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Apparently the FCC gave Cowboy a one week extension for free. Because they all fucking suck.
But I am slightly enjoying imagining how things must be going at Cowboy. They have to design their fucking ridiculous physically impossible spacecraft (that they specifically said in the FCC filing hasn't been designed yet) in the next week. Good luck, dipshits!
Looks like the Cowboy dipshits missed their extended FCC deadline? At least, there appears to be no new info from them.
...hooray? Only 4 companies, not 5 might possibly launch hundreds of thousands of fucking gigantic satellites to give Earth a new ring system https://arxiv.org/pdf/2608.02757 ...that will rapidly turn into full Kessler Syndrome https://arxiv.org/pdf/2607.29644
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Looks like the Cowboy dipshits missed their extended FCC deadline? At least, there appears to be no new info from them.
...hooray? Only 4 companies, not 5 might possibly launch hundreds of thousands of fucking gigantic satellites to give Earth a new ring system https://arxiv.org/pdf/2608.02757 ...that will rapidly turn into full Kessler Syndrome https://arxiv.org/pdf/2607.29644
Oh dammit nevermind that was the wrong system number. AUGH I hate that not only do we have to watch out for stupid filings of hundreds of thousands of satellites, but we have to be careful of WHICH filing of hundreds of thousands of satellites. This is stupid. They did file something.
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Cowboy space's application for stupidly ridiculous numbers of ludicrously large and probably impossible orbital "AI data centers" was SO BAD that the FCC asked them for loads of info. Which apparently they didn't provide by the deadline. Shucks. https://satnews.com/2026/09/13/the-fcc-asked-cowboy-space-how-big-its-satellites-are/
(Too bad 4 other companies have done the same fucking thing and the FCC hasn't stopped them)
Here’s another nickname if you want: the scented one.
Let’s hope this atrocity has a shorter lifetime than hyper loop.
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Oh dammit nevermind that was the wrong system number. AUGH I hate that not only do we have to watch out for stupid filings of hundreds of thousands of satellites, but we have to be careful of WHICH filing of hundreds of thousands of satellites. This is stupid. They did file something.
Oh. Poo


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Oh dammit nevermind that was the wrong system number. AUGH I hate that not only do we have to watch out for stupid filings of hundreds of thousands of satellites, but we have to be careful of WHICH filing of hundreds of thousands of satellites. This is stupid. They did file something.
So, their satellites will be 125m x 30m x 43m. "Cowboy Space has not yet completed its system design, but intends to design its satellites to achieve a casualty risk for an individual spacecraft of less than 0.0001 using NASA DAS"
HAHAHA wow. SpaceX provides ground casualty risks (zero, of course) that are completely unable to be replicated because they provide no info on their satellites. But they at least pretend that they've designed them already!
...Actually I'm not sure which is worse.
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So, their satellites will be 125m x 30m x 43m. "Cowboy Space has not yet completed its system design, but intends to design its satellites to achieve a casualty risk for an individual spacecraft of less than 0.0001 using NASA DAS"
HAHAHA wow. SpaceX provides ground casualty risks (zero, of course) that are completely unable to be replicated because they provide no info on their satellites. But they at least pretend that they've designed them already!
...Actually I'm not sure which is worse.
For reference, according to Wikipedia the International Space Station is 109m x 94m x 73m. And they want to launch 20,000 of them. And they haven't actually designed them yet.
This is such a ridiculous load of bullshit. And yet, I have to respond to this shit otherwise the FCC will license it and then more poorly planned satellites will get launched (well, they will probably license it no matter what I do, but at least this provides legal documentation for future actions, I hope)
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So, their satellites will be 125m x 30m x 43m. "Cowboy Space has not yet completed its system design, but intends to design its satellites to achieve a casualty risk for an individual spacecraft of less than 0.0001 using NASA DAS"
HAHAHA wow. SpaceX provides ground casualty risks (zero, of course) that are completely unable to be replicated because they provide no info on their satellites. But they at least pretend that they've designed them already!
...Actually I'm not sure which is worse.
@sundogplanets how many of these satellites do they want to send up? 20000? Then the 0.0001 casualty rate doesn't sound very reassuring

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Cowboy space's application for stupidly ridiculous numbers of ludicrously large and probably impossible orbital "AI data centers" was SO BAD that the FCC asked them for loads of info. Which apparently they didn't provide by the deadline. Shucks. https://satnews.com/2026/09/13/the-fcc-asked-cowboy-space-how-big-its-satellites-are/
(Too bad 4 other companies have done the same fucking thing and the FCC hasn't stopped them)
@sundogplanets i am not a physicist (or you can say I am failed one, as I studied it but never graduated) but can someone explain it to me: what's the point of having AI datacentre in space? I am reading it's for cooling but how they are going to cool it, there is no atmosphere to disperse the heat, there is no water to cool them down...
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@sundogplanets i am not a physicist (or you can say I am failed one, as I studied it but never graduated) but can someone explain it to me: what's the point of having AI datacentre in space? I am reading it's for cooling but how they are going to cool it, there is no atmosphere to disperse the heat, there is no water to cool them down...
@TOrynski I think the point is that people can't protest them as easily... absolutely nothing about data centres makes them easier or better to operate in space.
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@sundogplanets how many of these satellites do they want to send up? 20000? Then the 0.0001 casualty rate doesn't sound very reassuring
@weddige@gruene.social
I'm unsure if it's to be read as a count or a probability.
If it's a count, we get 2 casualties over the whole fleet
If it's a probability, we get a 86.5% casualty probabilty
Neither sounds great
@sundogplanets@mastodon.social
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@TOrynski I think the point is that people can't protest them as easily... absolutely nothing about data centres makes them easier or better to operate in space.
@sundogplanets we should be protesting bilionairs putting shit up in orbit more.
(btw, as per our conversation some time ago just recorded a podcast with an astronomer about Starlink, but unfortunately (for you :P) it's in Polish. But we recommend your mastodon account to follow in it)

