You're in a chatroom with people and it's clear that one Person thinks they are DM'ing Intended Recipient.
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@bkuhn I think it's helpful to let the person know they are writing publicly rather than privately.
Rather than argue with them I'd be tempted to turn this into a teaching moment, pointing out that when they talk about someone who's absent, they might consider doing so in the same way they would if that person were present. Because there's never any guarantee that what you write won't get back to them.
@bodhipaksa I like this approach.
I have strong opinions about people and their policies. I usually just end up saying them publicly, but if it's an ally I would say them privately to the person first, then disagree with them publicly.
Weirdly, the main complaint (that I wasn't supposed to see) was they felt I'd laid out my position too pedantically (apparently because I use footnotes in email? Which I've done for like 30 years, so maybe everyone already hates me for it and no one told me?)
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You're in a chatroom with people and it's clear that one Person thinks they are DM'ing Intended Recipient.
The Person writes their frank assessment of *you* personally and your allies — including mostly nasty and mean stuff that's just bullshit but some of it has some level of truthiness to it.
What do you do?
(I had this situation today and I basically just froze in uncertainty of what to do until it was all over.)
@bkuhn If possible I would forward it to Intended Recipient with Person cc and say: I believe this was meant for you. Then disengage (and fume privately).
