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  3. Aunt: Do you still make furniture

Aunt: Do you still make furniture

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  • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

    Aunt: Do you still make furniture?
    Me: What? I don't think I've ever made furniture.
    Aunt: But I remember when you were just out of college you were so proud of that job in NYC doing table design. On the computer. I guess you didn't really build them yourself, then.

    For two decades this sweet woman thought I was making literal wooden tables. I just thought that designing the tables was the most fun and glamorous part of database design.

    darkling@mstdn.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
    darkling@mstdn.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
    darkling@mstdn.social
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #14

    @futurebird Awww.

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • mansr@society.oftrolls.comM mansr@society.oftrolls.com

      @futurebird I'm confident I could make a crude table should the need arise. It probably wouldn't be very pretty though.

      futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
      futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
      futurebird@sauropods.win
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #15

      @mansr

      I'm considering a reality show where people have to do the job that other people THINK their job is.

      somevegancheeseisok@mastodon.socialS aprilfollies@mastodon.onlineA superflippy@mastodon.xyzS 3 Replies Last reply
      0
      • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

        @gbargoud

        Attaching legs to things is not at all trivial. Not all table-shaped objects are sturdy tables I'd trust to climb on and fix the curtains.

        angelastella@social.treehouse.systemsA This user is from outside of this forum
        angelastella@social.treehouse.systemsA This user is from outside of this forum
        angelastella@social.treehouse.systems
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #16

        @futurebird @gbargoud

        Yes to all of this. "Chaotic" maybe would clash with the need for some parts to be load-bearing but hey, trial and error, no one was born knowing everything, etc.

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

          @gbargoud

          Attaching legs to things is not at all trivial. Not all table-shaped objects are sturdy tables I'd trust to climb on and fix the curtains.

          somevegancheeseisok@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
          somevegancheeseisok@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
          somevegancheeseisok@mastodon.social
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #17

          @futurebird @gbargoud nobody said it had to be a *good* table.

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

            @mansr

            I'm considering a reality show where people have to do the job that other people THINK their job is.

            somevegancheeseisok@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
            somevegancheeseisok@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
            somevegancheeseisok@mastodon.social
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #18

            @futurebird @mansr oh dear.

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

              Aunt: Do you still make furniture?
              Me: What? I don't think I've ever made furniture.
              Aunt: But I remember when you were just out of college you were so proud of that job in NYC doing table design. On the computer. I guess you didn't really build them yourself, then.

              For two decades this sweet woman thought I was making literal wooden tables. I just thought that designing the tables was the most fun and glamorous part of database design.

              lambic@social.linux.pizzaL This user is from outside of this forum
              lambic@social.linux.pizzaL This user is from outside of this forum
              lambic@social.linux.pizza
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #19

              @futurebird i love the term chaotic carpentry

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                To be fair to her I was also into theatre and loved helping with set design and know a smattering of chaotic carpentry. But IDK if I could just post up and make a table.

                catmisgivings@stranger.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                catmisgivings@stranger.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                catmisgivings@stranger.social
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #20

                @futurebird for years we kept around this small, squat table my grandfather had made as a hobby project in the basement. It was the sturdiest thing in the house.

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                  @nickapos

                  *chars

                  doctormo@floss.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
                  doctormo@floss.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
                  doctormo@floss.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #21

                  @futurebird @nickapos

                  I'm sorry we need them to FLOAT; we have someone poppins round for tea.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                    @gbargoud

                    Attaching legs to things is not at all trivial. Not all table-shaped objects are sturdy tables I'd trust to climb on and fix the curtains.

                    gbargoud@masto.nycG This user is from outside of this forum
                    gbargoud@masto.nycG This user is from outside of this forum
                    gbargoud@masto.nyc
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #22

                    @futurebird

                    The way I made mine was to make a couple of H shaped leg assemblies that the table can rest on so pretty much all of the forces are compressive.

                    It's held up for 5 years so far and shows no sign of breaking anytime soon, I've stood my fat ass on it more than once to change the lightbulbs above it.

                    futurebird@sauropods.winF 2 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • hwll@sunny.gardenH hwll@sunny.garden

                      @futurebird omgooooodddddddd this is too pure and beautiful and like in some way I WISH I'd been making real tables for the last ten years 😭

                      onion@night.studio-2am.netO This user is from outside of this forum
                      onion@night.studio-2am.netO This user is from outside of this forum
                      onion@night.studio-2am.net
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #23
                      Let's retrain to be carpenters, so we can keep making tables.

                      @futurebird@sauropods.win @hwll@sunny.garden
                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                        To be fair to her I was also into theatre and loved helping with set design and know a smattering of chaotic carpentry. But IDK if I could just post up and make a table.

                        foolishowl@social.coopF This user is from outside of this forum
                        foolishowl@social.coopF This user is from outside of this forum
                        foolishowl@social.coop
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #24

                        @futurebird 'Whenever she "thought of his work" she always saw clearly before her a large kitchen table. It was Andrew’s doing. She asked him what his father’s books were about. "Subject and object and the nature of reality," Andrew had said. And when she said Heavens, she had no notion what that meant. "Think of a kitchen table then," he told her, "when you’re not there."'
                        -- Virginia Woolf, To the Lighthouse

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • gbargoud@masto.nycG gbargoud@masto.nyc

                          @futurebird

                          The way I made mine was to make a couple of H shaped leg assemblies that the table can rest on so pretty much all of the forces are compressive.

                          It's held up for 5 years so far and shows no sign of breaking anytime soon, I've stood my fat ass on it more than once to change the lightbulbs above it.

                          futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
                          futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
                          futurebird@sauropods.win
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #25

                          @gbargoud

                          Amazing!

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • gbargoud@masto.nycG gbargoud@masto.nyc

                            @futurebird

                            The way I made mine was to make a couple of H shaped leg assemblies that the table can rest on so pretty much all of the forces are compressive.

                            It's held up for 5 years so far and shows no sign of breaking anytime soon, I've stood my fat ass on it more than once to change the lightbulbs above it.

                            futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
                            futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
                            futurebird@sauropods.win
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #26

                            @gbargoud

                            I assume you have "table architecture and design" on your CV.

                            gbargoud@masto.nycG 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                              @gbargoud

                              I assume you have "table architecture and design" on your CV.

                              gbargoud@masto.nycG This user is from outside of this forum
                              gbargoud@masto.nycG This user is from outside of this forum
                              gbargoud@masto.nyc
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #27

                              @futurebird

                              Absolutely not, never doing that again. It was way too much effort and I do not have the patience to do it anywhere near correctly.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                @mansr

                                I'm considering a reality show where people have to do the job that other people THINK their job is.

                                aprilfollies@mastodon.onlineA This user is from outside of this forum
                                aprilfollies@mastodon.onlineA This user is from outside of this forum
                                aprilfollies@mastodon.online
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #28

                                @futurebird @mansr Cue the memes…

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                  To be fair to her I was also into theatre and loved helping with set design and know a smattering of chaotic carpentry. But IDK if I could just post up and make a table.

                                  clayfoot@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                                  clayfoot@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                                  clayfoot@mastodon.social
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #29

                                  @futurebird Chaotic Carpentry is the name of my MC Hammer cover band

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                    Aunt: Do you still make furniture?
                                    Me: What? I don't think I've ever made furniture.
                                    Aunt: But I remember when you were just out of college you were so proud of that job in NYC doing table design. On the computer. I guess you didn't really build them yourself, then.

                                    For two decades this sweet woman thought I was making literal wooden tables. I just thought that designing the tables was the most fun and glamorous part of database design.

                                    discobeez@mas.toD This user is from outside of this forum
                                    discobeez@mas.toD This user is from outside of this forum
                                    discobeez@mas.to
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #30

                                    @futurebird chaotic carpentry is the new goat farming

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                      Aunt: Do you still make furniture?
                                      Me: What? I don't think I've ever made furniture.
                                      Aunt: But I remember when you were just out of college you were so proud of that job in NYC doing table design. On the computer. I guess you didn't really build them yourself, then.

                                      For two decades this sweet woman thought I was making literal wooden tables. I just thought that designing the tables was the most fun and glamorous part of database design.

                                      seb321@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                      seb321@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                      seb321@mastodon.social
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #31

                                      @futurebird When I did database theory in my degree, one of the processes of normalisation was “no L shaped tables” ironically I have mainly worked on databases at L shaped desks ever since.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                        To be fair to her I was also into theatre and loved helping with set design and know a smattering of chaotic carpentry. But IDK if I could just post up and make a table.

                                        E This user is from outside of this forum
                                        E This user is from outside of this forum
                                        ext0li@beige.party
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #32

                                        @futurebird
                                        SELECT Top, Legs
                                        FROM Table
                                        JOIN Top ON Legs

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                          Aunt: Do you still make furniture?
                                          Me: What? I don't think I've ever made furniture.
                                          Aunt: But I remember when you were just out of college you were so proud of that job in NYC doing table design. On the computer. I guess you didn't really build them yourself, then.

                                          For two decades this sweet woman thought I was making literal wooden tables. I just thought that designing the tables was the most fun and glamorous part of database design.

                                          iamdannyboling@mstdn.socialI This user is from outside of this forum
                                          iamdannyboling@mstdn.socialI This user is from outside of this forum
                                          iamdannyboling@mstdn.social
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #33

                                          @futurebird

                                          omg that is so precious! 😍 I mean your aunt, and what you said about database design. So true!

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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