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  3. I hope John Roberts can't watch the NFL playoff games today because he has explosive diarrhea.

I hope John Roberts can't watch the NFL playoff games today because he has explosive diarrhea.

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  • vervain@sunny.gardenV vervain@sunny.garden

    @msbellows

    It really is time for so very many of us to be in the streets.

    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
    msbellows@c.im
    wrote on sidst redigeret af
    #403

    @vervain It frustrates me that the No Kings protests were mostly older folks like me. One of my two kids was out multiple nights for the Rodney King protests in Portland, but for some reason didn't come to a single No Kings, when honestly they were even more important. We need to figure out how to motivate everyone to fill the streets every single night and demand that this end now. Not only would it force the administration to step back and recalculate, but it also might give some spine to Jeffries and Schumer.

    vervain@sunny.gardenV 1 Reply Last reply
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    • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

      @vervain It frustrates me that the No Kings protests were mostly older folks like me. One of my two kids was out multiple nights for the Rodney King protests in Portland, but for some reason didn't come to a single No Kings, when honestly they were even more important. We need to figure out how to motivate everyone to fill the streets every single night and demand that this end now. Not only would it force the administration to step back and recalculate, but it also might give some spine to Jeffries and Schumer.

      vervain@sunny.gardenV This user is from outside of this forum
      vervain@sunny.gardenV This user is from outside of this forum
      vervain@sunny.garden
      wrote on sidst redigeret af
      #404

      @msbellows

      I don't think it is their spine. I think they like the current set up.

      Yeah, I have loved seeing all us olds in the streets... or, not really the streets but the sidewalks at least.

      And I love those of us out doing community watch work, too.

      The people going to city council meetings about flock and data centers are getting radicalized, I love to see that.

      Shit is moving. But it is underground. I wish it was growing faster.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

        When he ducks into a low-rent diner to grab what he believes is an incognito fast breakfast, #IHopeJohnRoberts is recognized by an astute immigrant working in the kitchen, who quickly removes a dead rat from the trap in the alley, runs it through the meat grinder, bones and teeth and fur and all, and sautés it for inclusion in the Chief Justice's omelette.

        (Yeah, some days it's a little challenging to keep this thread light and amusing. This is one of those days, because fuck that guy.)

        Supreme Court clears way for Trump’s mail voting executive order https://apnews.com/article/trump-mail-voting-supreme-court-157afc3c195ce0a62c522da5ce904b04

        msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
        msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
        msbellows@c.im
        wrote on sidst redigeret af
        #405

        #IHopeJohnRoberts eats the whole fzcking omelette and then wipes the plate clean with a bit of toast and eats that too.

        kanamauna@sauropods.winK eljorgeabides@mastodon.worldE msbellows@c.imM 3 Replies Last reply
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        • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

          #IHopeJohnRoberts eats the whole fzcking omelette and then wipes the plate clean with a bit of toast and eats that too.

          kanamauna@sauropods.winK This user is from outside of this forum
          kanamauna@sauropods.winK This user is from outside of this forum
          kanamauna@sauropods.win
          wrote on sidst redigeret af
          #406

          @msbellows there’s no way that he has not been fed several rat omelettes to date

          msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
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          • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

            #IHopeJohnRoberts eats the whole fzcking omelette and then wipes the plate clean with a bit of toast and eats that too.

            eljorgeabides@mastodon.worldE This user is from outside of this forum
            eljorgeabides@mastodon.worldE This user is from outside of this forum
            eljorgeabides@mastodon.world
            wrote on sidst redigeret af
            #407

            @msbellows

            I thought this was a little too nice, then I remembered the omelette's ingredients

            msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • kanamauna@sauropods.winK kanamauna@sauropods.win

              @msbellows there’s no way that he has not been fed several rat omelettes to date

              msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
              msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
              msbellows@c.im
              wrote on sidst redigeret af
              #408

              @KanaMauna Food adulteration definitely has been a factor in some of the posts upthread, but I can't remember if rats were one of them. No one deserves it more, though!

              kanamauna@sauropods.winK 1 Reply Last reply
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              • eljorgeabides@mastodon.worldE eljorgeabides@mastodon.world

                @msbellows

                I thought this was a little too nice, then I remembered the omelette's ingredients

                msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                msbellows@c.im
                wrote on sidst redigeret af
                #409

                @eljorgeabides 🙂

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                  @KanaMauna Food adulteration definitely has been a factor in some of the posts upthread, but I can't remember if rats were one of them. No one deserves it more, though!

                  kanamauna@sauropods.winK This user is from outside of this forum
                  kanamauna@sauropods.winK This user is from outside of this forum
                  kanamauna@sauropods.win
                  wrote on sidst redigeret af
                  #410

                  @msbellows I meant IRL. He may not be aware of it, but I’m certain there are plenty of people who made sure that the mofo paid for his sins.

                  msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • kanamauna@sauropods.winK kanamauna@sauropods.win

                    @msbellows I meant IRL. He may not be aware of it, but I’m certain there are plenty of people who made sure that the mofo paid for his sins.

                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                    msbellows@c.im
                    wrote on sidst redigeret af
                    #411

                    @KanaMauna Oh, yeah. All of them (except maybe the Handmaid) at least have had their food spit in.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                      #IHopeJohnRoberts eats the whole fzcking omelette and then wipes the plate clean with a bit of toast and eats that too.

                      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                      msbellows@c.im
                      wrote on sidst redigeret af
                      #412

                      Two hours after unknowingly eating the rat omelette, #IHopeJohnRoberts is in a filthy gas station bathroom expelling the poison from both ends when two other guys walk in talking sadly about Dolly Parton's passing, which he hadn't heard about yet, and he unexpectedly finds himself sobbing even though he never actually liked her music that much.

                      msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                        msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                        msbellows@c.im
                        wrote on sidst redigeret af
                        #413

                        @DeliaChristina

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • armadillosoft@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                          armadillosoft@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                          armadillosoft@mastodon.social
                          wrote on sidst redigeret af
                          #414

                          @DeliaChristina @msbellows

                          This is a waste of time and electrons.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • armadillosoft@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                            armadillosoft@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                            armadillosoft@mastodon.social
                            wrote on sidst redigeret af
                            #415

                            @DeliaChristina @msbellows

                            I am nice. Also I don't believe in Karma. Also, reading lots of people's stupid things they hope will happen to John Roberts is almost as big a waste of time as writing down stupid things you want to happen to him.

                            msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • armadillosoft@mastodon.socialA armadillosoft@mastodon.social

                              @DeliaChristina @msbellows

                              I am nice. Also I don't believe in Karma. Also, reading lots of people's stupid things they hope will happen to John Roberts is almost as big a waste of time as writing down stupid things you want to happen to him.

                              msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                              msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                              msbellows@c.im
                              wrote on sidst redigeret af
                              #416

                              @Armadillosoft @DeliaChristina Yeah, that's a block, asshole. Bye.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                Two hours after unknowingly eating the rat omelette, #IHopeJohnRoberts is in a filthy gas station bathroom expelling the poison from both ends when two other guys walk in talking sadly about Dolly Parton's passing, which he hadn't heard about yet, and he unexpectedly finds himself sobbing even though he never actually liked her music that much.

                                msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                msbellows@c.im
                                wrote on sidst redigeret af
                                #417

                                After he finishes clearing his digestive tract of rat omelette and sobbing for the death of Dolly Parton, #IHopeJohnRoberts goes back to that public library and gets on one of the public computers to catch up on the world and is shocked to find that behind his back his wife (or he thinks it's his wife but who knows, maybe she's still abroad with her pelvic health therapist and it's actually the imposter who signed his name to that order about Trump's ballroom) but anyway someone pretending to be him has sold his home in Chevy Chase ( https://www.realtor.com/news/trends/supreme-court-john-roberts-maryland-home-sold-price/), and also some guy in Colorado has been trying to impersonate him (https://news.bloomberglaw.com/us-law-week/man-accused-of-impersonating-chief-justice-roberts-nsa-agent) though he doubts that's related, but taken all together he's starting to wonder once again whether he's actually dead and just thinks he's in Kansas City, which would be interesting because he never envisioned Heaven as being just like Kansas City, assuming he's in Heaven and not..., well anyway, being dead actually might be okay because apparently he no longer has a home to go back to anyway, and also he wonders what's happened to all his stuff just like other dead people do*.

                                *(Not everyone knows that dead people always wonder what's happened to their stuff, but he knows it's true, because Roberts' great great great grandfather told his father so in a dream and he's sure his father never lied to him ever.)

                                oldclumsy_nowmad@mastodon.socialO karlauerbach@sfba.socialK msbellows@c.imM 3 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                  After he finishes clearing his digestive tract of rat omelette and sobbing for the death of Dolly Parton, #IHopeJohnRoberts goes back to that public library and gets on one of the public computers to catch up on the world and is shocked to find that behind his back his wife (or he thinks it's his wife but who knows, maybe she's still abroad with her pelvic health therapist and it's actually the imposter who signed his name to that order about Trump's ballroom) but anyway someone pretending to be him has sold his home in Chevy Chase ( https://www.realtor.com/news/trends/supreme-court-john-roberts-maryland-home-sold-price/), and also some guy in Colorado has been trying to impersonate him (https://news.bloomberglaw.com/us-law-week/man-accused-of-impersonating-chief-justice-roberts-nsa-agent) though he doubts that's related, but taken all together he's starting to wonder once again whether he's actually dead and just thinks he's in Kansas City, which would be interesting because he never envisioned Heaven as being just like Kansas City, assuming he's in Heaven and not..., well anyway, being dead actually might be okay because apparently he no longer has a home to go back to anyway, and also he wonders what's happened to all his stuff just like other dead people do*.

                                  *(Not everyone knows that dead people always wonder what's happened to their stuff, but he knows it's true, because Roberts' great great great grandfather told his father so in a dream and he's sure his father never lied to him ever.)

                                  oldclumsy_nowmad@mastodon.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
                                  oldclumsy_nowmad@mastodon.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
                                  oldclumsy_nowmad@mastodon.social
                                  wrote on sidst redigeret af
                                  #418

                                  @msbellows

                                  Philosophical question: do rats get off of a ship because it is sinking, or because they've eaten every tasty thing that was aboard?

                                  msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • oldclumsy_nowmad@mastodon.socialO oldclumsy_nowmad@mastodon.social

                                    @msbellows

                                    Philosophical question: do rats get off of a ship because it is sinking, or because they've eaten every tasty thing that was aboard?

                                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    msbellows@c.im
                                    wrote on sidst redigeret af
                                    #419

                                    @oldclumsy_nowmad Yes.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                      After he finishes clearing his digestive tract of rat omelette and sobbing for the death of Dolly Parton, #IHopeJohnRoberts goes back to that public library and gets on one of the public computers to catch up on the world and is shocked to find that behind his back his wife (or he thinks it's his wife but who knows, maybe she's still abroad with her pelvic health therapist and it's actually the imposter who signed his name to that order about Trump's ballroom) but anyway someone pretending to be him has sold his home in Chevy Chase ( https://www.realtor.com/news/trends/supreme-court-john-roberts-maryland-home-sold-price/), and also some guy in Colorado has been trying to impersonate him (https://news.bloomberglaw.com/us-law-week/man-accused-of-impersonating-chief-justice-roberts-nsa-agent) though he doubts that's related, but taken all together he's starting to wonder once again whether he's actually dead and just thinks he's in Kansas City, which would be interesting because he never envisioned Heaven as being just like Kansas City, assuming he's in Heaven and not..., well anyway, being dead actually might be okay because apparently he no longer has a home to go back to anyway, and also he wonders what's happened to all his stuff just like other dead people do*.

                                      *(Not everyone knows that dead people always wonder what's happened to their stuff, but he knows it's true, because Roberts' great great great grandfather told his father so in a dream and he's sure his father never lied to him ever.)

                                      karlauerbach@sfba.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                                      karlauerbach@sfba.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                                      karlauerbach@sfba.social
                                      wrote on sidst redigeret af
                                      #420

                                      @msbellows Hmm, $250,000 above the asking price. A quick sale. Was it a cash deal without contingencies? Might one wonder whether this is a sub-rosa bribe?

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                        After he finishes clearing his digestive tract of rat omelette and sobbing for the death of Dolly Parton, #IHopeJohnRoberts goes back to that public library and gets on one of the public computers to catch up on the world and is shocked to find that behind his back his wife (or he thinks it's his wife but who knows, maybe she's still abroad with her pelvic health therapist and it's actually the imposter who signed his name to that order about Trump's ballroom) but anyway someone pretending to be him has sold his home in Chevy Chase ( https://www.realtor.com/news/trends/supreme-court-john-roberts-maryland-home-sold-price/), and also some guy in Colorado has been trying to impersonate him (https://news.bloomberglaw.com/us-law-week/man-accused-of-impersonating-chief-justice-roberts-nsa-agent) though he doubts that's related, but taken all together he's starting to wonder once again whether he's actually dead and just thinks he's in Kansas City, which would be interesting because he never envisioned Heaven as being just like Kansas City, assuming he's in Heaven and not..., well anyway, being dead actually might be okay because apparently he no longer has a home to go back to anyway, and also he wonders what's happened to all his stuff just like other dead people do*.

                                        *(Not everyone knows that dead people always wonder what's happened to their stuff, but he knows it's true, because Roberts' great great great grandfather told his father so in a dream and he's sure his father never lied to him ever.)

                                        msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                        msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                        msbellows@c.im
                                        wrote on sidst redigeret af
                                        #421

                                        While he's in the public library, #IHopeJohnRoberts finds a paperback copy of Kerouac's "The Dharma Bums" and since he really liked reading "On The Road" on the Greyhound bus ride from DC to KC, and since it doesn't look very expensive and he doesn't have a Kansas City library card and hasn't found any bookstores that have it in stock, he just puts it in his jacket pocket and walks out, except he doesn't realize library books now have RFID chips, and a loud alarm sounds and a very angry librarian (who, believe it or not, actually has sort of a beehive hairdo and wears those pointy tipped rhinestone-embedded glasses you always imagine when you're thinking of a librarian) comes storming out from behind her desk and he has to run out the front door like a common thief and he gets away but as he leans winded against a wall three blocks away he realizes that now he actually *is* a common thief, and he wonders whether something has shifted in his morals without him noticing, but then he shrugs off that feeling by reminding himself that he is a very very good man who only wants the best for his country and hasn't ever done anything he should feel guilty about, and he reassures himself that the fact that he's now living out of a duffel bag in a sleazy downtown Kansas City motel fully estranged from his entire family and no home to go back to and probably being hunted by the US Marshals Service all is simply a string of bad luck, not karma, and then when he gets back to his motel room he finds yet another dead rat lying on the threshold, so he turns around and goes to a liquor store around the corner and buys the first thing he sees, which is a bottle of fortified wine, which he carries out clutched in a thin paper bag.

                                        sunumbral@beige.partyS msbellows@c.imM 2 Replies Last reply
                                        0
                                        • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                          While he's in the public library, #IHopeJohnRoberts finds a paperback copy of Kerouac's "The Dharma Bums" and since he really liked reading "On The Road" on the Greyhound bus ride from DC to KC, and since it doesn't look very expensive and he doesn't have a Kansas City library card and hasn't found any bookstores that have it in stock, he just puts it in his jacket pocket and walks out, except he doesn't realize library books now have RFID chips, and a loud alarm sounds and a very angry librarian (who, believe it or not, actually has sort of a beehive hairdo and wears those pointy tipped rhinestone-embedded glasses you always imagine when you're thinking of a librarian) comes storming out from behind her desk and he has to run out the front door like a common thief and he gets away but as he leans winded against a wall three blocks away he realizes that now he actually *is* a common thief, and he wonders whether something has shifted in his morals without him noticing, but then he shrugs off that feeling by reminding himself that he is a very very good man who only wants the best for his country and hasn't ever done anything he should feel guilty about, and he reassures himself that the fact that he's now living out of a duffel bag in a sleazy downtown Kansas City motel fully estranged from his entire family and no home to go back to and probably being hunted by the US Marshals Service all is simply a string of bad luck, not karma, and then when he gets back to his motel room he finds yet another dead rat lying on the threshold, so he turns around and goes to a liquor store around the corner and buys the first thing he sees, which is a bottle of fortified wine, which he carries out clutched in a thin paper bag.

                                          sunumbral@beige.partyS This user is from outside of this forum
                                          sunumbral@beige.partyS This user is from outside of this forum
                                          sunumbral@beige.party
                                          wrote on sidst redigeret af
                                          #422

                                          @msbellows Muttering "you can't fall off the mountain, spodee odee."

                                          sunumbral@beige.partyS 1 Reply Last reply
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