I hope John Roberts can't watch the NFL playoff games today because he has explosive diarrhea.
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@Devils_Rancher @FiddleSix @msbellows impossible to distinguish from reality. Equally plausible and definitely less depressing.
@IcooIey @Devils_Rancher @FiddleSix Except to him, of course.
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As he strolls through Kansas City looking for a low-profile breakfast joint, #IHopeJohnRoberts quickly realizes that going commando in damp wool slacks isn't exactly helping his jock itch problem.
When he ducks into a low-rent diner to grab what he believes is an incognito fast breakfast, #IHopeJohnRoberts is recognized by an astute immigrant working in the kitchen, who quickly removes a dead rat from the trap in the alley, runs it through the meat grinder, bones and teeth and fur and all, and sautés it for inclusion in the Chief Justice's omelette.
(Yeah, some days it's a little challenging to keep this thread light and amusing. This is one of those days, because fuck that guy.)
Supreme Court clears way for Trump’s mail voting executive order https://apnews.com/article/trump-mail-voting-supreme-court-157afc3c195ce0a62c522da5ce904b04
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When he ducks into a low-rent diner to grab what he believes is an incognito fast breakfast, #IHopeJohnRoberts is recognized by an astute immigrant working in the kitchen, who quickly removes a dead rat from the trap in the alley, runs it through the meat grinder, bones and teeth and fur and all, and sautés it for inclusion in the Chief Justice's omelette.
(Yeah, some days it's a little challenging to keep this thread light and amusing. This is one of those days, because fuck that guy.)
Supreme Court clears way for Trump’s mail voting executive order https://apnews.com/article/trump-mail-voting-supreme-court-157afc3c195ce0a62c522da5ce904b04
Oh my fucking gods
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Oh my fucking gods
@vervain Pretty awful ruling, huh?
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@vervain Pretty awful ruling, huh?
It really is time for so very many of us to be in the streets.
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It really is time for so very many of us to be in the streets.
@vervain It frustrates me that the No Kings protests were mostly older folks like me. One of my two kids was out multiple nights for the Rodney King protests in Portland, but for some reason didn't come to a single No Kings, when honestly they were even more important. We need to figure out how to motivate everyone to fill the streets every single night and demand that this end now. Not only would it force the administration to step back and recalculate, but it also might give some spine to Jeffries and Schumer.
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@vervain It frustrates me that the No Kings protests were mostly older folks like me. One of my two kids was out multiple nights for the Rodney King protests in Portland, but for some reason didn't come to a single No Kings, when honestly they were even more important. We need to figure out how to motivate everyone to fill the streets every single night and demand that this end now. Not only would it force the administration to step back and recalculate, but it also might give some spine to Jeffries and Schumer.
I don't think it is their spine. I think they like the current set up.
Yeah, I have loved seeing all us olds in the streets... or, not really the streets but the sidewalks at least.
And I love those of us out doing community watch work, too.
The people going to city council meetings about flock and data centers are getting radicalized, I love to see that.
Shit is moving. But it is underground. I wish it was growing faster.
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When he ducks into a low-rent diner to grab what he believes is an incognito fast breakfast, #IHopeJohnRoberts is recognized by an astute immigrant working in the kitchen, who quickly removes a dead rat from the trap in the alley, runs it through the meat grinder, bones and teeth and fur and all, and sautés it for inclusion in the Chief Justice's omelette.
(Yeah, some days it's a little challenging to keep this thread light and amusing. This is one of those days, because fuck that guy.)
Supreme Court clears way for Trump’s mail voting executive order https://apnews.com/article/trump-mail-voting-supreme-court-157afc3c195ce0a62c522da5ce904b04
#IHopeJohnRoberts eats the whole fzcking omelette and then wipes the plate clean with a bit of toast and eats that too.
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#IHopeJohnRoberts eats the whole fzcking omelette and then wipes the plate clean with a bit of toast and eats that too.
@msbellows there’s no way that he has not been fed several rat omelettes to date
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#IHopeJohnRoberts eats the whole fzcking omelette and then wipes the plate clean with a bit of toast and eats that too.
I thought this was a little too nice, then I remembered the omelette's ingredients
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@msbellows there’s no way that he has not been fed several rat omelettes to date
@KanaMauna Food adulteration definitely has been a factor in some of the posts upthread, but I can't remember if rats were one of them. No one deserves it more, though!
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I thought this was a little too nice, then I remembered the omelette's ingredients
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@KanaMauna Food adulteration definitely has been a factor in some of the posts upthread, but I can't remember if rats were one of them. No one deserves it more, though!
@msbellows I meant IRL. He may not be aware of it, but I’m certain there are plenty of people who made sure that the mofo paid for his sins.
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@msbellows I meant IRL. He may not be aware of it, but I’m certain there are plenty of people who made sure that the mofo paid for his sins.
@KanaMauna Oh, yeah. All of them (except maybe the Handmaid) at least have had their food spit in.
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#IHopeJohnRoberts eats the whole fzcking omelette and then wipes the plate clean with a bit of toast and eats that too.
Two hours after unknowingly eating the rat omelette, #IHopeJohnRoberts is in a filthy gas station bathroom expelling the poison from both ends when two other guys walk in talking sadly about Dolly Parton's passing, which he hadn't heard about yet, and he unexpectedly finds himself sobbing even though he never actually liked her music that much.
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This is a waste of time and electrons.
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I am nice. Also I don't believe in Karma. Also, reading lots of people's stupid things they hope will happen to John Roberts is almost as big a waste of time as writing down stupid things you want to happen to him.
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I am nice. Also I don't believe in Karma. Also, reading lots of people's stupid things they hope will happen to John Roberts is almost as big a waste of time as writing down stupid things you want to happen to him.
@Armadillosoft @DeliaChristina Yeah, that's a block, asshole. Bye.
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Two hours after unknowingly eating the rat omelette, #IHopeJohnRoberts is in a filthy gas station bathroom expelling the poison from both ends when two other guys walk in talking sadly about Dolly Parton's passing, which he hadn't heard about yet, and he unexpectedly finds himself sobbing even though he never actually liked her music that much.
After he finishes clearing his digestive tract of rat omelette and sobbing for the death of Dolly Parton, #IHopeJohnRoberts goes back to that public library and gets on one of the public computers to catch up on the world and is shocked to find that behind his back his wife (or he thinks it's his wife but who knows, maybe she's still abroad with her pelvic health therapist and it's actually the imposter who signed his name to that order about Trump's ballroom) but anyway someone pretending to be him has sold his home in Chevy Chase ( https://www.realtor.com/news/trends/supreme-court-john-roberts-maryland-home-sold-price/), and also some guy in Colorado has been trying to impersonate him (https://news.bloomberglaw.com/us-law-week/man-accused-of-impersonating-chief-justice-roberts-nsa-agent) though he doubts that's related, but taken all together he's starting to wonder once again whether he's actually dead and just thinks he's in Kansas City, which would be interesting because he never envisioned Heaven as being just like Kansas City, assuming he's in Heaven and not..., well anyway, being dead actually might be okay because apparently he no longer has a home to go back to anyway, and also he wonders what's happened to all his stuff just like other dead people do*.
*(Not everyone knows that dead people always wonder what's happened to their stuff, but he knows it's true, because Roberts' great great great grandfather told his father so in a dream and he's sure his father never lied to him ever.)
