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  3. So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me.

So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me.

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  • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
    secureowl@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
    secureowl@infosec.exchange
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #1

    So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

    We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

    “Oh man, yeah please.”

    My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

    America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

    davemwilburn@infosec.exchangeD lawyersgunsnmoney@mstdn.socialL uair@autistics.lifeU tyzbit@toot.nowT n8dly@mastodon.socialN 59 Replies Last reply
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    • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

      So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

      We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

      “Oh man, yeah please.”

      My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

      America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

      davemwilburn@infosec.exchangeD This user is from outside of this forum
      davemwilburn@infosec.exchangeD This user is from outside of this forum
      davemwilburn@infosec.exchange
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #2

      @SecureOwl

      I wonder if this is a regionalism, because as a born-and-raised American from what constitutes (just barely) the South, not offering at least a glass of water is borderline offensive.

      cshlan@dawdling.netC internetsdairy@mastodon.artI bluesandcoffee@mastodon.socialB somenerv@mastodon.socialS tarnport@mastodon.greenT 5 Replies Last reply
      0
      • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

        So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

        We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

        “Oh man, yeah please.”

        My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

        America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

        lawyersgunsnmoney@mstdn.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
        lawyersgunsnmoney@mstdn.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
        lawyersgunsnmoney@mstdn.social
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #3

        @SecureOwl Mrs DB and I also do this. Especially with this horrific hot weather, offering water or a cold drink is always greatly appreciated. To me it’s not strange, it’s just being nice and recognizing the humanity of others.

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

          So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

          We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

          “Oh man, yeah please.”

          My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

          America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

          uair@autistics.lifeU This user is from outside of this forum
          uair@autistics.lifeU This user is from outside of this forum
          uair@autistics.life
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #4

          @SecureOwl

          I do. I have a building maintenance guy. He changed my kitchen faucet recently.

          I gave him a cup of tea.

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

            So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

            We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

            “Oh man, yeah please.”

            My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

            America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

            tyzbit@toot.nowT This user is from outside of this forum
            tyzbit@toot.nowT This user is from outside of this forum
            tyzbit@toot.now
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #5

            @SecureOwl the cold capitalism thing that always pierces my heart is when they ask to use the restroom, because they are "not allowed to make stops between calls", not even to find a public restroom.

            i do offer drinks too, though being of less British provenance than you it's usually water or soda. sometimes we have a spare sweet tea float into the house and that gets offered.

            i don't think your wife is unusually rude or unaccommodating, just that americans are taught to be suspicious of everyone they did not meet through a trusted person. the idea of trusting someone by default first is supposed to be naive and unsafe.

            secureowl@infosec.exchangeS 1 Reply Last reply
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            • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

              So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

              We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

              “Oh man, yeah please.”

              My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

              America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

              n8dly@mastodon.socialN This user is from outside of this forum
              n8dly@mastodon.socialN This user is from outside of this forum
              n8dly@mastodon.social
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #6

              @SecureOwl Californian: I always offer coffee, water, sparkling water… whatever we got. And always a cooler on the front porch with iced water for the mail person on days when it’s going to be over 100F.

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • davemwilburn@infosec.exchangeD davemwilburn@infosec.exchange

                @SecureOwl

                I wonder if this is a regionalism, because as a born-and-raised American from what constitutes (just barely) the South, not offering at least a glass of water is borderline offensive.

                cshlan@dawdling.netC This user is from outside of this forum
                cshlan@dawdling.netC This user is from outside of this forum
                cshlan@dawdling.net
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #7

                @DaveMWilburn @SecureOwl
                I came here to say this.

                More people around here carry their own so I offer less often but it is how I was raised.

                mywoolymastadon@toot.communityM 1 Reply Last reply
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                • tyzbit@toot.nowT tyzbit@toot.now

                  @SecureOwl the cold capitalism thing that always pierces my heart is when they ask to use the restroom, because they are "not allowed to make stops between calls", not even to find a public restroom.

                  i do offer drinks too, though being of less British provenance than you it's usually water or soda. sometimes we have a spare sweet tea float into the house and that gets offered.

                  i don't think your wife is unusually rude or unaccommodating, just that americans are taught to be suspicious of everyone they did not meet through a trusted person. the idea of trusting someone by default first is supposed to be naive and unsafe.

                  secureowl@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
                  secureowl@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
                  secureowl@infosec.exchange
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #8

                  @tyzbit yeah she says that she was always told that folks don’t like to accept drinks in case they have to pee in the customers restroom, but i am fully prepared should that happen because i literally don’t care if someone has to pee or even poop in the dedicated place we have for such activities

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                    So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                    We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                    “Oh man, yeah please.”

                    My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                    America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                    kevinflynn@c.imK This user is from outside of this forum
                    kevinflynn@c.imK This user is from outside of this forum
                    kevinflynn@c.im
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #9

                    @SecureOwl
                    Yeah, of course. Maybe it's also a Midwestern thing to do, and I keep bottled water around for guests, it has the fewest questions

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                      So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                      We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                      “Oh man, yeah please.”

                      My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                      America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                      401matthall@mastodon.xyz4 This user is from outside of this forum
                      401matthall@mastodon.xyz4 This user is from outside of this forum
                      401matthall@mastodon.xyz
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #10

                      @SecureOwl

                      Not weird, at all.

                      It's a lovely courtesy and on top of that shows a great deal of respect particularly for working tradespeople.

                      It's not going to get cooler. A water sharing culture seems like a natural response to the weather changing.

                      I love every bit of this. ❤

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                        So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                        We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                        “Oh man, yeah please.”

                        My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                        America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                        grumpydad@infosec.exchangeG This user is from outside of this forum
                        grumpydad@infosec.exchangeG This user is from outside of this forum
                        grumpydad@infosec.exchange
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #11

                        @SecureOwl I'm confused. Doesn't everyone do this?

                        secureowl@infosec.exchangeS 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                          So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                          We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                          “Oh man, yeah please.”

                          My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                          America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                          caffinepwrd@infosec.exchangeC This user is from outside of this forum
                          caffinepwrd@infosec.exchangeC This user is from outside of this forum
                          caffinepwrd@infosec.exchange
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #12

                          @SecureOwl I third this is not weird. Though don't do what I did. A dark stormy night Mormon Missionaries showed up at my door. They were soaked. I had just made coffee. I offered them cups to go 😅 I realized my mistake after closing the door.

                          sumisu@famichiki.jpS 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                            So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                            We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                            “Oh man, yeah please.”

                            My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                            America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                            jensilber@mastodon.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                            jensilber@mastodon.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                            jensilber@mastodon.social
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #13

                            @SecureOwl I (American) tend to think of offering only if the temperatures are extreme (either very hot or very cold) but you're right. I'm also surprised when workers ask to use the restroom as though they're bargaining for my firstborn -- like of course you can use the facilities when needed!

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                              So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                              We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                              “Oh man, yeah please.”

                              My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                              America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                              justin@mastodon.tacoma.communityJ This user is from outside of this forum
                              justin@mastodon.tacoma.communityJ This user is from outside of this forum
                              justin@mastodon.tacoma.community
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #14

                              @SecureOwl
                              Not a Brit, but I also do this to anyone who comes to my home.

                              I also feel this should be normalized and we should treat all other humans with kindness rather than "the help"

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                                So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                                We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                                “Oh man, yeah please.”

                                My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                                America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                                donaldham@mstdn.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
                                donaldham@mstdn.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
                                donaldham@mstdn.social
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #15

                                @SecureOwl
                                I grew up in Oklahoma, and it would always have been inhospitable not to offer something.

                                When I was little (I'm old, so we're talking 1950s) it was not uncommon for a stranger to knock on the door and ask for a glass of water, and of course we'd be happy to help. It was a far more trusting place and time.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • grumpydad@infosec.exchangeG grumpydad@infosec.exchange

                                  @SecureOwl I'm confused. Doesn't everyone do this?

                                  secureowl@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  secureowl@infosec.exchangeS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  secureowl@infosec.exchange
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #16

                                  @grumpydad apparently not - my wife was always told that people didnt want to potentially have to pee in a customers house lol

                                  bertdriehuis@infosec.exchangeB 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                                    So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                                    We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                                    “Oh man, yeah please.”

                                    My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                                    America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                                    alexadeswift@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                    alexadeswift@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                    alexadeswift@lgbtqia.space
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #17

                                    @SecureOwl

                                    Definitely a British thing, it is considered rude not to offer a cuppa, or a sandwhich, biscuits or a slice of cake for a longer job!

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                                      So because I am a British what moved to America, some British traits persist in me. For example, if we have a contractor round for any reason, I’m gonna offer them a drink - to include a cup of tea.

                                      We had a guy come over to look at our dryer yesterday because it recently exploded. The look on his face when I offered him a drink. It was like I’d just offered to pay off his mortgage.

                                      “Oh man, yeah please.”

                                      My wife (American), thinks it’s such a strange thing I do.

                                      America, we must normalize this practice. Become responsible for hydrating anyone who sets foot in your home.

                                      mycrowgirl@flipping.rocksM This user is from outside of this forum
                                      mycrowgirl@flipping.rocksM This user is from outside of this forum
                                      mycrowgirl@flipping.rocks
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #18

                                      @SecureOwl I’m not Brittish, but… it’s such an intensely instinctual thing for me to offer *at minimum* basic hydration and means of relieving/cleansing oneself.

                                      I’ve travelled a lot in my life, and that has been just such a near universal social contract.

                                      So it feels wildly jarring when I’m somewhere that isn’t the default mode. Doubly so if basic comfort is provided to anyone entering the home except service providers/workers. That takes it from jarring to icky for me.

                                      bnys@lasersword.clubB 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • caffinepwrd@infosec.exchangeC caffinepwrd@infosec.exchange

                                        @SecureOwl I third this is not weird. Though don't do what I did. A dark stormy night Mormon Missionaries showed up at my door. They were soaked. I had just made coffee. I offered them cups to go 😅 I realized my mistake after closing the door.

                                        sumisu@famichiki.jpS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        sumisu@famichiki.jpS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        sumisu@famichiki.jp
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #19

                                        @caffinepwrd @SecureOwl my Finnish Lutheran grandfather always offered the Mormon and Jehovah’s Witness door knockers a cup of coffee and happily would talk to them for hours. They would decline the coffee but ask for water, if he didn’t mind. Problem was my grandparents had sulphur water.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • mycrowgirl@flipping.rocksM mycrowgirl@flipping.rocks

                                          @SecureOwl I’m not Brittish, but… it’s such an intensely instinctual thing for me to offer *at minimum* basic hydration and means of relieving/cleansing oneself.

                                          I’ve travelled a lot in my life, and that has been just such a near universal social contract.

                                          So it feels wildly jarring when I’m somewhere that isn’t the default mode. Doubly so if basic comfort is provided to anyone entering the home except service providers/workers. That takes it from jarring to icky for me.

                                          bnys@lasersword.clubB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          bnys@lasersword.clubB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          bnys@lasersword.club
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #20

                                          @mycrowgirl @SecureOwl when overseeing major construction on my childhood home, my mom used to at least offer water to workers, and when it was really hot we'd give them popsicles. she was always really tight with her general contractors and relied on them until they retired

                                          sarraceniawilds@sunny.gardenS 1 Reply Last reply
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