Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

[marud@social.marud.fr]

@vkc what the actual f is wrong with humanity

[cyberwitch@goingdark.social]

and also, I've noticed POC on Mastodon with similar complaints that are, similarly, minimized or ignored. The Fediverse culture is showing some large-scale bad patterns here. "Progressive" communities and platforms need to quit ignoring and tone-policing people when issues arise.

[haltroy@mastodon.social]

@vkc I hope you are doing OK, I had no idea that other people on Fedi to be this bad. I thought since it's userbase is more smarter I wouldn't guessed this would happen.

I'd be cool if Mastodon had a "list" feature like bsky does, where you can add people to there and auto-block/mute them. Kinda useful thing, especially on these.

[jirikiha@raphus.social]

@vkc men, do better.

Be a man in the internet. Talk about what you like. Cars, weather, trains, sports. See how the replies are on topic.

Be a woman on the internet. Talk about what you like.
Cars, weather, trains, sports. See the replies talking about your boobs. See the DMs filled with, "hey baby", and unsolicited dick pics.

If you are a man, you won't see most - or any! - of what women experience daily online. That doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Your just in a safe little bubble of privilege. Own it, and do better.

[midtsveen@social.linux.pizza]

@vkc Apparently women are “too woke.” Well, I love women, so I guess that makes me woke too. Extra woke, even. Maximum wokeness, omg. ️ ️‍ Haters gonna hate regardless, be you! ️

[janhelms@rheinneckar.social]

@alex02 @vkc Hey Alex, want to block me, too? Because I totally disagree with you, and blockings seems your way to cope with other opinions.

[disorderlyf@todon.eu]

@vkc I wonder if it's a good sign for my instance that I'm seeing a lot of replies to what I presume is people being sexist pricks but not their actual posts.

[randyhughesking@mastodon.social]

@vkc My crew is working on it. Culturally, we are training to call out and effectively moderate (banning, blocking, defederating) and figuring out 'financing' of who does it and hours required of manual moderation w/volunteers.

Structurally, there's common sexism/problem phrases that are just stupidly common, a pre-filter for all posts containing known BS, expanding on any emergent phrasing case-by-case

PSA channels with zero commenting for local civics also on the drawing board.

Thoughts?

[vkc@linuxmom.net]

@disorderlyf probably. I know folks are reporting posts and that's almost certainly creating some blocks right now.

[legit_spaghetti@mastodo.neoliber.al]

@vkc Moderation is a difficult problem to solve. Whenever I see content that is unwelcome (sexual harassment is at the top of that list), I report it, but not once have I received notice that anything has been done based on those reports.

On top of that, reporting bad actors is reactive and does nothing to undo the harassment that occurred.

Seems like the only approach that works is to loudly and publicly name & shame harassers. But that opens up another can of worms.

Ugh.

[disorderlyf@todon.eu]

@vkc Well, for what it's worth, I'll report any I see if someone else doesn't beat me to it.

[jakekb@mastodon.social]

@vkc Even though fedi doesn't have algorithms to encourage such behavior, it can still happen and it is often beyond the powers of the managers of the instance to police everyone. It is everyone's responsibility to be vigilant and always protect their communities from trolls. Also that's a useful thing to do in real life too. Don't wait for the officer to answer, do something.

[orb2069@mastodon.online]

@haltroy

There's a certain subset of people who are pushing an _ideology_, and the sexism is an expression of that ideology.

They're going to keep coming back from bans, and making sock puppets because appearing to be more numerous than they are is in service of that ideology.

Promoting the idea that they can't be stopped and the only way they can be delt with is by giving them what they want is also in service of that ideology.

@vkc

[gimulnautti@mastodon.green]

@vkc Fook! In Finland we take those people behind the Sauna!

[simonzerafa@infosec.exchange]

@vkc

🥺

[orb2069@mastodon.online]

@Kernelkebap

You should approach this potlatch style: you offer a graphic description of something nasty that happened to you, to the public, unsolicited - be sure to roll around in it, really feel all the horrible feelings it evoked. Make sure to link the other party.

**Then** you can ask someone else to do the same, realizing that they aren't obligated to return your 'gift' in kind.

@vkc

[haltroy@mastodon.social]

@Orb2069 @vkc It's 2026 and we still dealing with those people's "ideologies" from ancient times of humanity. It haunted everyone back in those days, it haunted everyone through ages and it still keeps haunting people till this moment.

[brad@1040ste.net]

@alex02 @vkc boop boop boop deleted

[the_wub@mastodon.social]

@alex02@elonsucks.org @vkc Block or block and report.

Not really difficult to decide in this case.

Edit : Done @alex02@elonsucks.org blocked and reported

[effariwhy@mastodon.social]

@vkc women will just stay on corporate social media even more because at least the user base there isn't so heavily skewed white male. I'd only been posting regularly for about a week here and got tone policed by some dude who said he was muting me for 30 days because I wasn't cheery enough. I extended his 30 days with a block. I've been in tech for over 25 years and I don't play.