Every time I decide to post a thread to Mastodon, I'm hit with a new wave of mansplaining.
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is this like a play on words with your handle?
@mishandlingboners @emilymbender If you're referring to Feather Duster, it's a saying referring to fleeting popularity.
Of you're referring to Hypocritus, it's someone Socrates interogates.
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@troy_frizzell This isn't about being a nerd. I know plenty of nerds who are also respectful.
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RE: https://dair-community.social/@emilymbender/110906329010147244
Every time I decide to post a thread to Mastodon, I'm hit with a new wave of mansplaining. What is it with the culture here? Why do all of these guys think it's so important to share their deep insights in my mentions when they can just post on their own feed? FFS.
@emilymbender probably due to lots of reddit users and misfits desperate for interaction. Responses can feel very similar to those on reddit where people tend to be contrarians for the sake of being contrarian. Some kind of troll like carryover…almost built in to some people’s online persona at this point. Ive had so many people on reddit act this way to my posts/comments in the past. Thankfully its made me pretty immune to the pointless venture of retorting over nothing with most users.
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Sry, but why has mastodon and it's community to be as you wish it to see?
If LinkedIn and blsky suits you and your needs, isn't that enough?
Actually this is the fedi, so you most likely have work arounds, like posting from a wordpress instance via activityPub addon disabling comments for example.
And no, mastodon doesn't have to be a "eierlegende Wollmilchsau", that's why we are a decentralized network with an underlying communication protocol.
@jesuisatire @emilymbender Thanks for illustrating Emily's point.
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@vonxylofon Yes, it is particularly bad on Mastodon. I post frequently on LinkedIn and bsky too and (up until Nov 2024) posted frequently on Xitter. Mastodon is the worst in this regard.
@emilymbender That truly sucks.
I haven't seen that very much, but I'm on a tiny anarchist server and most of my follows are on beige.party and fringe servers like that, so it's easy not to see the mainstream discourse.
I wish I knew what to do, but instance-level moderation (basically the only tool available AFAIK) can do only so much with the reach you have.
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RE: https://dair-community.social/@emilymbender/110906329010147244
Every time I decide to post a thread to Mastodon, I'm hit with a new wave of mansplaining. What is it with the culture here? Why do all of these guys think it's so important to share their deep insights in my mentions when they can just post on their own feed? FFS.
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@jesuisatire @emilymbender Thanks for illustrating Emily's point.
@vonxylofon
your welcome! -
RE: https://dair-community.social/@emilymbender/110906329010147244
Every time I decide to post a thread to Mastodon, I'm hit with a new wave of mansplaining. What is it with the culture here? Why do all of these guys think it's so important to share their deep insights in my mentions when they can just post on their own feed? FFS.
@emilymbender Would it help anything if we snark at them - ie. "Your 'splainer is showing.."-type replies - or would that just make it worse since you still get the notifications etc.?
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@vonxylofon Yes, it is particularly bad on Mastodon. I post frequently on LinkedIn and bsky too and (up until Nov 2024) posted frequently on Xitter. Mastodon is the worst in this regard.
@emilymbender @vonxylofon I experience this a lot on Mastodon as well. It is incredibly annoying (to say the least), and I'm very sorry you experience this too, Emily
I'm really looking forward to a potential future feature where I could limit replies to my public posts to my followers only. Each time I have a mansplainer in my replies, it's never one of my followers or someone I follow (my followers are great!).
I hope this could help you too. I value the insights and expertise you share immensely. It would be a real tragedy to lose your contribution to Mastodon Emily. In solidarity
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@emilymbender would this be the wrong time to answer?
@kepeken @emilymbender yeah, I'm not falling for this.
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Speaking as someone who would like to help, it seems Mastodon has a hole here. I believe it was @mekkaokereke who pointed out that shitty people say shitty (racist) things in his replies, but people like me never see them because these trolls tag their replies as 'Only for my followers.'
Many people would happily counter this sort of thing, but we never see it.
Suggestions?
@elasticsoul @emilymbender @mekkaokereke @Gargron
Until just now I have never thought about anyone using this feature for that
Thank you for bringing it up. -
RE: https://dair-community.social/@emilymbender/110906329010147244
Every time I decide to post a thread to Mastodon, I'm hit with a new wave of mansplaining. What is it with the culture here? Why do all of these guys think it's so important to share their deep insights in my mentions when they can just post on their own feed? FFS.
If you see that behaviour coming from anyone on infosec.exchange please let us know.
More than happy to mansplain the rules or enforce them if needed.
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@emilymbender @vonxylofon I experience this a lot on Mastodon as well. It is incredibly annoying (to say the least), and I'm very sorry you experience this too, Emily
I'm really looking forward to a potential future feature where I could limit replies to my public posts to my followers only. Each time I have a mansplainer in my replies, it's never one of my followers or someone I follow (my followers are great!).
I hope this could help you too. I value the insights and expertise you share immensely. It would be a real tragedy to lose your contribution to Mastodon Emily. In solidarity
@Em0nM4stodon yeah @mellifluousbox @renchap why can't people limit replies to followers-only on Mastodon? That's a really useful option!
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RE: https://dair-community.social/@emilymbender/110906329010147244
Every time I decide to post a thread to Mastodon, I'm hit with a new wave of mansplaining. What is it with the culture here? Why do all of these guys think it's so important to share their deep insights in my mentions when they can just post on their own feed? FFS.
@emilymbender There are a lot of technically-inclined people on Mastodon. A very large proportion of technically-inclined men are horrifically misogynistic (not even necessarily consciously so, just have a default stance of "women don't know X").
For me the proof of that assertion was found in my mute and block files.
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@emilymbender well Professor, I would go and make a wild assumption that the reply button invites other user's to talk about the topic of your post.
@atanasoff @emilymbender There is an ENORMOUS difference between "talk about the topic of your post" and "explain to an expert their area of expertise because she has a vagina".
But you knew that already and are just being a twat for the sake of being a twat, right?
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I didn't see the exact posts you were referring to but so I may be wrong, but generally the idea of posting in response to someone is to produce a conversation, which many consider to be the goal of social medias.
@lienrag @emilymbender Prof. Bender was being polite.
I'm not going to be.
Head off and learn what words fucking **MEAN*** before you use them or respond to them.
"Mansplaining" is not "men explaining". It's a very specific word with a very specific meaning.
I'm doing you the credit of assuming you don't already know that, though I'm pretty sure you do and are just being an asshole.
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@emilymbender Would it help anything if we snark at them - ie. "Your 'splainer is showing.."-type replies - or would that just make it worse since you still get the notifications etc.?
@tofticles you could probably avoid @emilymbender getting the notifications for your snarks if you remove her from the mentions, though I have my doubts it'd help any in making the mansplainers reconsider their action
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@Em0nM4stodon yeah @mellifluousbox @renchap why can't people limit replies to followers-only on Mastodon? That's a really useful option!
@codinghorror @Em0nM4stodon @mellifluousbox @renchap Because the increasingly-identical-to-every-other-techbrodude-making-social-media Mastodon team either lacks knowledge and thus doesn't understand what marginalized groups have to put up with, or lacks empathy and doesn't care.
Given the number of times this specific feature has been brought up with them (not to mention a plethora of instance management features), I'm going to guess it's the latter.
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i think that this norm is potentially part of the explanation, but by no means all. when i've (more and less rudely, if i'm being honest) pointed this out to people doing mansplainy replies, they generally ignore the commentary and double down on expressing their belief that the behavior of replying however they want is appropriate and is "what social media is for". my being polite and patient does not result in a higher rate of self-reflection
@inquiline @RainbowStardiver Yep. There's no technical problem that's making mansplainers mansplain. Mansplainers mansplained on Xhitter loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong before it became the Nazi bar, and they had post quoting. Mansplainers mansplain here even now that they have the post quote facility. And, as you so nicely pointed out, telling them they're mansplaining doesn't get them to stop, so ... there is no technical solution for this bad-faith elocution (with apologies to Sting).
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Sry, but why has mastodon and it's community to be as you wish it to see?
If LinkedIn and blsky suits you and your needs, isn't that enough?
Actually this is the fedi, so you most likely have work arounds, like posting from a wordpress instance via activityPub addon disabling comments for example.
And no, mastodon doesn't have to be a "eierlegende Wollmilchsau", that's why we are a decentralized network with an underlying communication protocol.
Congratulations, you just proved her point
