What's your biggest turn-on when it comes to dating profile pictures?
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@alice May I introduce you to Jonathan the Sturgeon Guy
@jef @alice I would have totally swiped right back in the day, since he's obvs a pro and I would have a lot to talk about with a fish bio
I used to swipe left if guys had photos where they were using a chainsaw with inadequate PPE
yes this meant that I got a variety of "sexy selfies" when my now-husband got a new pair of saw chaps
(I swiped right on him bc he had what I thought might be a Labor Notes reference on his profile AND IT WAS)
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@alice (but is it the dog or the gun doing duck lips?)
@eruonna both.
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What's your biggest turn-on when it comes to dating profile pictures?
Wrong answers only.
Photo taken inside a car!
WTAF???
And, if this is your only private space, does that mean you are married and cheating?
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@alice May I introduce you to Jonathan the Sturgeon Guy
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@alice I remember two pictures from my now-spouse's OkCupid dating profile.
One was a sexy beach pic. Specifically, it was a windswept, overcast, PNW beach and she was wearing foul weather gear and looking at a collection of seal bones.
The other was a fuck pic. Or rather, a clothed picture of her grinning and extending her middle finger, saying "fuck you!" She told me later this was in the event one of her exes found her profile.
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@alice Damn, missed the wrong answers only instruction.
I couldn't bear a dating app where everyone was properly dressed. -
@alice I tried, for years, to talk to the "guys holding fish" about if they would take me fishing as a date and it was always: "oh that was one time on my buddy's boat" or "oh, that was from a trip" or "we were on a charter boat"
They NEVER actually FISH!!!!
@pencilears @alice IDK I matched with a guy who was an actual fishing guide once
but I was like six inches taller than him and not Roman Catholic so it wasn't going to work, alas
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When this is done, I should commission an artist¹ to make this scientifically accurate, world's hottest profile pic, using AI.
¹ Like a real one, not a "prompt engineer".
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@alice honestly, if your picture were an AI-generated dog holding a gun doing duck lips with its dick out, I'd probably at least give you a second look
@alice or doing dick lips with its duck out?
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@alice I tried, for years, to talk to the "guys holding fish" about if they would take me fishing as a date and it was always: "oh that was one time on my buddy's boat" or "oh, that was from a trip" or "we were on a charter boat"
They NEVER actually FISH!!!!
Similar experience matching and chatting with women who have a picture of themselves river rafting/rock climbing/skydiving/outdoorsy-ing. I now subconsciously caption those photos "here's that one and only time ever I did [activity] that I have no intention of doing again but posted because I want you to think I am adventurous. Also, it was eight years ago."
I am betting that straight men do this constantly. Seems very much like a dude thing.
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What's your biggest turn-on when it comes to dating profile pictures?
Wrong answers only.
@alice Was looking for Blahaj, but then I see wrong anwsers only.
I am taking this literally
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@pencilears @alice IDK I matched with a guy who was an actual fishing guide once
but I was like six inches taller than him and not Roman Catholic so it wasn't going to work, alas
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@alice I tried, for years, to talk to the "guys holding fish" about if they would take me fishing as a date and it was always: "oh that was one time on my buddy's boat" or "oh, that was from a trip" or "we were on a charter boat"
They NEVER actually FISH!!!!
@pencilears @alice Well clearly you never met *this* guy (satire): https://archive.is/2e9sf (archive/unpaywall of https://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/i-am-a-tinder-guy-holding-a-fish-and-i-will-provide-for-you)
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Similar experience matching and chatting with women who have a picture of themselves river rafting/rock climbing/skydiving/outdoorsy-ing. I now subconsciously caption those photos "here's that one and only time ever I did [activity] that I have no intention of doing again but posted because I want you to think I am adventurous. Also, it was eight years ago."
I am betting that straight men do this constantly. Seems very much like a dude thing.
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@pencilears @sarae @alice
OMG.
You all really want the fisher people?
I can't NOT meet fish heads in my line of work.
Even *I'* have caught a few. -
@pencilears @sarae @alice
OMG.
You all really want the fisher people?
I can't NOT meet fish heads in my line of work.
Even *I'* have caught a few. -
@pencilears @sarae @alice
OMG.
You all really want the fisher people?
I can't NOT meet fish heads in my line of work.
Even *I'* have caught a few.people who like the same kind of fishing should hang out yesno? Save friction with other people
I know someone whose second marriage, late in life, was happy while they could both go bass fishing all the time and be silent together. Then they got too frail to do that and everything fell apart.
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@alice I tried, for years, to talk to the "guys holding fish" about if they would take me fishing as a date and it was always: "oh that was one time on my buddy's boat" or "oh, that was from a trip" or "we were on a charter boat"
They NEVER actually FISH!!!!
Fishing is just an excuse to drink beer
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What's your biggest turn-on when it comes to dating profile pictures?
Wrong answers only.
@alice [•] it’s on a dating site that would have me as a member
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When this is done, I should commission an artist¹ to make this scientifically accurate, world's hottest profile pic, using AI.
¹ Like a real one, not a "prompt engineer".
Let me guess,,, a duck holding a gun.
have swiped right for the first one 
