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@cmconseils Yeah, I'll settle for some hot wires in a metal cage shaped to allow slices of bread to sit close to, but not touch the wires and maybe a timer rigged to those wires.
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@zash @cmconseils I adore that YT channel, and yes, I saw the toaster episode.
@redrummy @zash @cmconseils I have this toaster, it's pretty fantastic.
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Also: why don’t toasters have a window so you can see how toasted your bread is
@cmconseils why in the world would your toaster need an internet connection, or to know what time or date it is? It's not like you're going to leave slices of bread to get stale in the toaster and to auto-toast in the morning, right? sheesh.
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@cmconseils why in the world would your toaster need an internet connection, or to know what time or date it is? It's not like you're going to leave slices of bread to get stale in the toaster and to auto-toast in the morning, right? sheesh.
@briankrebs @cmconseils to track license compliance with your toast as a service subscription
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@jonathankoren @cmconseils @niavy
My wife asked what it can do that her $30 toaster can't. I replied "Crash."
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Also: why don’t toasters have a window so you can see how toasted your bread is
@cmconseils probably because that would release all the previous infrared in there
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@cmconseils why in the world would your toaster need an internet connection, or to know what time or date it is? It's not like you're going to leave slices of bread to get stale in the toaster and to auto-toast in the morning, right? sheesh.
@briankrebs @cmconseils It's certainly hard to convince for-profit manufacturers of this, but we really need to start stressing how important the principle of Least Amount Of Technology Necessary is. -
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@cmconseils This has been coming since 1990 - I saw it at Interop '90.
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@cmconseils Cheers, bread! *toasts*
Cory Doctorow (@pluralistic) gave a sneak peak on what that update one day will contain:
https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/01/unauthorized-bread-a-near-future-tale-of-refugees-and-sinister-iot-appliances/ -
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@cmconseils I had to cancel downloading my toast midway the other day because the cops came. They found out I was getting it off piratebay.
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@cmconseils
so, you want a camera
will come with the next version@Joe_von_Saporski @cmconseils with facial recognition too so it can tell when it's Jesus or some random guy that appears on my toast.
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@cmconseils this...this isn't real is it? there isn't actually a TOASTER with all this is there??
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@jonathankoren @cmconseils @niavy
My wife asked what it can do that her $30 toaster can't. I replied "Crash."
@w_b @cmconseils @niavy “Babe. Did you remember to patch the toaster?”
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@cmconseils@mastodon.social
Stupidity of a connected toaster aside...
Why isn't it configured to update overnight? -
Actually, this (and worse) was/is predicted: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radicalized_(book) by "Unauthorized Bread".
@BoydStephenSmithJr @rbmath @niavy @cmconseils
I was just coming here to note this book by @pluralistic - this story made me laugh out loud and then cry inside for how plausible an internet connected proprietary toaster over could be....
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@cmconseils This seems like a very ballsy design decision to make in an appliance that 100% of users are going to be, at a minimum, hungry when using. Which itself isn't a problem, except that "hungry" is going to be combined with "just woke up" and one or more of "hung over" or "in a hurry".
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@bhaugland Very British of it to be like, "Would you like a bite to eat while you ponder life being just 80-90 years of existential dread wrapped in a t-shirt?"
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@cmconseils why in the world would your toaster need an internet connection, or to know what time or date it is? It's not like you're going to leave slices of bread to get stale in the toaster and to auto-toast in the morning, right? sheesh.
@briankrebs @cmconseils
I thought it was so you could download clipart for the bread… -
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@cmconseils They do this to make the products worse, so they’ll break and make us spend more money on them. We’re down to ‘smart’ pencils. Anything to enshittify every aspect of our lives in this capitalist hellscape.
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@cmconseils why in the world would your toaster need an internet connection, or to know what time or date it is? It's not like you're going to leave slices of bread to get stale in the toaster and to auto-toast in the morning, right? sheesh.
