If a baguette could move, how would it move?

[sheepfilms@mastodon.social]

@Nael great answer!

[baz@mastodon.scot]

@sheepfilms If it was a lovely light crunchy French baguette, it’d fly gently through the air. However a British supermarket baguette would probably smash those elegant black tiles whatever method of locomotion it attempted.

[sheepfilms@mastodon.social]

@rich ooof! Dad joke haha

[bazzargh@hachyderm.io]

@sheepfilms it would deploy a sail and be carried along by the bries

[sheepfilms@mastodon.social]

@at You're not the first person to reply with this

[tsadiq@rivals.space]

@sheepfilms definitely 7 ; as a french man i know that a baguette cannot bend without losing bits of crust, and a crust is part of the identity of a baguette, so it had to be 3 🧐

But given the alternatives, 7 is more really more like it. Give it arms and a mouth to whistle, and it will go to the bakery, fetch a tiny baguette for breakfast and bring it home by holding it under its arm, because this is the way

[helge@mas.to]

@sheepfilms 2, naturally, as the origin of the name "Bah-Ghett" stems from the sound its two legs make as it runs.

[photovince@mastodon.social]

@sheepfilms 1 and 4 are basically the same (slug) - where’s the slithering snake?

Edit: There it is.. #8

[sheepfilms@mastodon.social]

@photovince 1 is a worm and 4 is a caterpillar

[mariana400@col.social]

@sheepfilms 5, as it maintains form and has a rhythm that allows it to protect from natural predators.

[eater@cijber.social]

@sheepfilms 1, it is natural to the inner structure of the baguette, and can be done with minimal tearing

[mungus@jorts.horse]

@sheepfilms I think it would slither like a snake. Possibly a sidewinder

[ahchay@mastodon.gamedev.place]

@sheepfilms I still like 3 - that end over end thing is nice and satisfying, and you're not stuck with one direction of movement

[xarvos@outerheaven.club]

@sheepfilms@mastodon.social oh you’re the original author of this gif?

[sheepfilms@mastodon.social]

@xarvos yes

[heinragas@mublog.nl]

@sheepfilms All of these are viable, the baguette chooses it's gait based on how fast it wants to go and the surface it wants to traverse, just like a horse.

[transitionalaspect@fnordon.de]

@sheepfilms I'm happy we're thinking about the big questions in life today.

I'm torn between 1 and 4.

[transitionalaspect@fnordon.de]

@sheepfilms Thinking more about this, we are missing important information. Are we talking about a proper bakery baguette or these horrors from the supermarket for whom 8 would not result in texture change?

Also -- where does it live?

[malwen@toot.wales]

@sheepfilms 1. Any fast movements are going to damage the crust. I think 1 is probably the easiest type of motion to execute extremely slowly. It probably moves about 1cm a week.

[knud@mastodon.social]

@sheepfilms

What an utterly absurd question "If a baguette could move, how would it move?"

Obviously it's #4!