This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...
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Well, my disgust/apprehension is moot anyway.
We don't have them in Canada, and it doesn't look like I'll be travelling anytime soon...
@Sassinake @alice
This one is fifty loonies. It doesn't heat the water or noth'n, but it's a start and you can take it with you when you move.https://www.amazon.ca/PIKETS-butt-fountain/dp/B09QPDWXWC?affiliate_id=nah+this+is+fedi+lmao
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@ColesStreetPothole @Sassinake @alice
you're both right
1. it's easier and cheaper than ever before to install a bidet on your toilet
2. bidets are until very recently associated with the class divide
@benroyce @ColesStreetPothole @Sassinake @alice
The best bidets need electrical power, for example to heat the water and to air dry. That’s the challenge for broad use, as most houses won’t have power outlets near a toilet. -
@macacator @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice
the toilet attachment is easy and cheap
a whole damn bidet means big $$$ and it assumes you have a massive bathroom
@benroyce @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice it's a luxury I want but can't afford because a white man with brain worms laid us all off. Like, just looked at that machine running fine and shit himself from all the impotent rage in his heart and said: "not on my watch. "
All I have left are dreams of getting my hairy ass washed after dropping off the browns to the spooper bowl.
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@benroyce @ColesStreetPothole @Sassinake @alice
The best bidets need electrical power, for example to heat the water and to air dry. That’s the challenge for broad use, as most houses won’t have power outlets near a toilet.@MrBirch @ColesStreetPothole @Sassinake @alice
good point
the plumbing seems relatively straightfoward. but the electric work is a next level
well, a shot of cold water up the bum would do wonders to wake you up in the morning
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@benroyce @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice it's a luxury I want but can't afford because a white man with brain worms laid us all off. Like, just looked at that machine running fine and shit himself from all the impotent rage in his heart and said: "not on my watch. "
All I have left are dreams of getting my hairy ass washed after dropping off the browns to the spooper bowl.
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@alice @suzannealdrich @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake sometimes, when you ate one too many potatoes, your body will churn out a recycled burrito the size of a Sam's club sausage. You look at it in its unbroken abomination and wonder how you're going to flush that bad boy.
/the poop knife has entered the chat
You grab that knife, reach on down there and turn that sausage log into a sushi roll with a few swift chops. Now you can safely flush using that bucket you poured earlier.
@macacator I am both fascinated and traumatized by this new knowledge.
@suzannealdrich @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake
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@AnachronistJohn @alice @nina_kali_nina now playing: "i took a shit in ibiza, to show Avicii i was cool [...]"
also, compilation of My Little Pony where it's just them saying fluttershy but shy get's replaced with shit.
also on the menu: perfectly cut fart sounds with grand canyon reverb effect
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@benroyce @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice it's a luxury I want but can't afford because a white man with brain worms laid us all off. Like, just looked at that machine running fine and shit himself from all the impotent rage in his heart and said: "not on my watch. "
All I have left are dreams of getting my hairy ass washed after dropping off the browns to the spooper bowl.
@macacator I never thought I'd be disappointed in a brain-worm's performance, but that's the timeline we live in now.
@benroyce @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake
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@alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
real men give themselves anal fissures!
show the poop who is boss!
if you're not wiping with sandpaper quality toilet paper you're WEAK!
(/s)
🥴
@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
You're vacationing in russia? But theirs was mostly wood chips. . .
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@paul_ipv6 @alice but this was also when I discovered Akihabara and all the amazing little stalls selling just one kind of thing.
Now you have to go to Shenzhen for that.
@petrillic @paul_ipv6 @alice Yeah, I remember that Akihabara, too. Hardly go there now that it's changed. Not really into maid cafes.
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This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...
- boob wash
- water-park ride
- options menu
- multiplayer select- volume control
- channel selector
- smoking instructions?I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.
@alice World's least-conspicuous off button. Mine's got a big orange (?) button with a black square dot in the middle, under the legend 止.
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This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...
- boob wash
- water-park ride
- options menu
- multiplayer select- volume control
- channel selector
- smoking instructions?I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.
@alice I guess they just gave up on the description translation. Here’s the original version.
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@alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
real men give themselves anal fissures!
show the poop who is boss!
if you're not wiping with sandpaper quality toilet paper you're WEAK!
(/s)
🥴
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@enbypirate @alice So to speak.
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This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...
- boob wash
- water-park ride
- options menu
- multiplayer select- volume control
- channel selector
- smoking instructions?I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.
I was at my in-laws' house and also could not find the off button, I was on the bidet like "shit, am I stuck here or do I stand up and have my back hosed down with bidet water?"
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@eedly @alice having come late in life to appreciate the utility of an under-the-toilet-seat style of bidet, I can speak on the topic of water velocity with wisdom. With the under-seat variety at least, the water supply is the same as refills the toilet tank. It is commonly possible to adjust the pressure (which also adjusts how quickly the toilet tank refills). By this adjustment, one can calibrate a suitably forceful and yet not perilously forceful pressure for the "jet". A bidet will save a family many rolls of paper (albeit at the cost of having a set of individual "drying towels" added to the laundry duty).
@CadeJohnson @eedly @alice my toilet-seat bidet has heated seat and water, and a (very ineffective) dryer. Ahhh… tho sitting on something full of water that’s also plugged into the mains is a little unsettling.
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We definitely shouldn't be considered any kind of expert on deciphering symbols
Nor would we seek to tell somebody else that their interpretation of signs is wrong.
If we told you what we see those as, it would tell you a lot about how our mind works
@SleepyCatten
Now I'm very curious
Mind telling me what see the symbols as, please? :3 -
@sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice
people would want to look at their poop for health reasons. so you poop on a shelf in the bowl for inspection
it's fading away, it's mostly historical and a curiousity nowadays in old houses. new builds in the netherlands don't have it. and it's not unique to the netherlands
@benroyce @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice Decades ago, that was the standard in Poland. I don't know if people wanted it—it was just the standard.
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@alice Thank you for turning this example of "universally-understandable iconography that averts language issues" into such a fun post!
@MySideIsHumanity
They should make an international bidet symbol set like the laundry symbols
