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  3. My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

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  • ? Gæst

    My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

    Turns water into wine
    Floats on water
    Makes bread for 5000 people
    Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
    Jesus was a sourdough starter.

    Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

    lanaehforaday@universeodon.comL This user is from outside of this forum
    lanaehforaday@universeodon.comL This user is from outside of this forum
    lanaehforaday@universeodon.com
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #12

    @Buster

    MIND

    BLOWN

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • psneeze@mastodon.ieP psneeze@mastodon.ie

      @Buster And he spread to 2.3 billion of the world's population of 8 billion which makes him a yeast infection.

      lanaehforaday@universeodon.comL This user is from outside of this forum
      lanaehforaday@universeodon.comL This user is from outside of this forum
      lanaehforaday@universeodon.com
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #13

      Oh Jesus!

      @psneeze @Buster

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • ? Gæst

        My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

        Turns water into wine
        Floats on water
        Makes bread for 5000 people
        Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
        Jesus was a sourdough starter.

        Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

        bololacertus@mstdn.mxB This user is from outside of this forum
        bololacertus@mstdn.mxB This user is from outside of this forum
        bololacertus@mstdn.mx
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #14

        @Buster Now the part of "eat of this bread for it is my flesh" makes sense. It was not about zombies at all.

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • ? Gæst

          My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

          Turns water into wine
          Floats on water
          Makes bread for 5000 people
          Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
          Jesus was a sourdough starter.

          Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

          nigenet@mastodon.socialN This user is from outside of this forum
          nigenet@mastodon.socialN This user is from outside of this forum
          nigenet@mastodon.social
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #15

          @Buster Now singing "Jesus was a sourdough starter" to the tune of Jerry Was A Racecar Driver by Primus 🙂

          ozzelot@mstdn.socialO 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • ? Gæst

            My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

            Turns water into wine
            Floats on water
            Makes bread for 5000 people
            Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
            Jesus was a sourdough starter.

            Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

            yuvalne@433.worldY This user is from outside of this forum
            yuvalne@433.worldY This user is from outside of this forum
            yuvalne@433.world
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #16

            @Buster funnily enough, some fringe scholars do actually think Jesus was a type of fungus, though they use other (quite out there) arguments to get to that conclusion.
            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Sacred_Mushroom_and_the_Cross?wprov=sfla1

            celesteh@hachyderm.ioC 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • ? Gæst

              My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

              Turns water into wine
              Floats on water
              Makes bread for 5000 people
              Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
              Jesus was a sourdough starter.

              Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

              jasper@mastodon.nlJ This user is from outside of this forum
              jasper@mastodon.nlJ This user is from outside of this forum
              jasper@mastodon.nl
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #17

              @Buster 🍞 nom https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sacramental_bread

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • yuvalne@433.worldY yuvalne@433.world

                @Buster funnily enough, some fringe scholars do actually think Jesus was a type of fungus, though they use other (quite out there) arguments to get to that conclusion.
                https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Sacred_Mushroom_and_the_Cross?wprov=sfla1

                celesteh@hachyderm.ioC This user is from outside of this forum
                celesteh@hachyderm.ioC This user is from outside of this forum
                celesteh@hachyderm.io
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #18

                @Yuvalne @Buster

                This is the plot to a Philip K Dick novel. It's one of my favourites.

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • psneeze@mastodon.ieP psneeze@mastodon.ie

                  @Buster And he spread to 2.3 billion of the world's population of 8 billion which makes him a yeast infection.

                  akamran@indieweb.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                  akamran@indieweb.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                  akamran@indieweb.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #19

                  @psneeze @Buster ok that made me cackle out loud, thank god I'm alone atm

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • ? Gæst

                    My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

                    Turns water into wine
                    Floats on water
                    Makes bread for 5000 people
                    Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
                    Jesus was a sourdough starter.

                    Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

                    amro@todon.nlA This user is from outside of this forum
                    amro@todon.nlA This user is from outside of this forum
                    amro@todon.nl
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #20

                    @Buster Yeastus! 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • nigenet@mastodon.socialN nigenet@mastodon.social

                      @Buster Now singing "Jesus was a sourdough starter" to the tune of Jerry Was A Racecar Driver by Primus 🙂

                      ozzelot@mstdn.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
                      ozzelot@mstdn.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
                      ozzelot@mstdn.social
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #21

                      @nigenet @Buster The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme also gets the job done.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • jwcph@helvede.netJ jwcph@helvede.net shared this topic
                      • ? Gæst

                        My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

                        Turns water into wine
                        Floats on water
                        Makes bread for 5000 people
                        Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
                        Jesus was a sourdough starter.

                        Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

                        nickapos@mastodon.oncrete.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                        nickapos@mastodon.oncrete.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                        nickapos@mastodon.oncrete.uk
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #22

                        @Buster I am pretty Jesus pronoun would be them

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • ? Gæst

                          My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

                          Turns water into wine
                          Floats on water
                          Makes bread for 5000 people
                          Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
                          Jesus was a sourdough starter.

                          Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

                          travisfw@fosstodon.orgT This user is from outside of this forum
                          travisfw@fosstodon.orgT This user is from outside of this forum
                          travisfw@fosstodon.org
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #23

                          @Buster in his book Entangled Life, Merlin Sheldrake has a section collecting theories about psychedelic fungi originating religions, connecting possession and enlightenment and so on.

                          Jesus was definitely a fun-gi.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                            @agowa338 @Buster
                            The truth was hidden in plain sight right there in his own words, but no one ever realized it before!

                            “Again he asked, ‘What shall I compare the kingdom of God to? It is like yeast that a woman took and mixed into about thirty kilograms of flour until it worked all through the dough.’” – Luke 13:20-21

                            "Be careful. Watch out for the yeast of the Pharisees and that of Herod.” – Mark 8:15

                            msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                            msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                            msbellows@c.im
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #24

                            @agowa338 @Buster OOH! OOH! And what Jewish holiday did Easter ("He is risen! he is risen indeed!") evolve from?

                            The Feast of Unleavened Bread!

                            psneeze@mastodon.ieP 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                              @agowa338 @Buster OOH! OOH! And what Jewish holiday did Easter ("He is risen! he is risen indeed!") evolve from?

                              The Feast of Unleavened Bread!

                              psneeze@mastodon.ieP This user is from outside of this forum
                              psneeze@mastodon.ieP This user is from outside of this forum
                              psneeze@mastodon.ie
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #25

                              @msbellows @agowa338 @Buster Yeaster?

                              msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • ? Gæst

                                My favourite piece of internet today is the theory that Jesus was actually a type of yeast.

                                Turns water into wine
                                Floats on water
                                Makes bread for 5000 people
                                Put in a cave for 3 days and lo - he has risen!
                                Jesus was a sourdough starter.

                                Also this would imply: We should be calling him 'Mother' not 'Father'

                                rk@mastodon.well.comR This user is from outside of this forum
                                rk@mastodon.well.comR This user is from outside of this forum
                                rk@mastodon.well.com
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #26

                                @Buster

                                Is made of bread. Or the other way around, anyway. Sometimes. Kinda.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • psneeze@mastodon.ieP psneeze@mastodon.ie

                                  @msbellows @agowa338 @Buster Yeaster?

                                  msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                  msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                  msbellows@c.im
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #27

                                  @psneeze @agowa338 @Buster Excellent.

                                  psneeze@mastodon.ieP 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                    @psneeze @agowa338 @Buster Excellent.

                                    psneeze@mastodon.ieP This user is from outside of this forum
                                    psneeze@mastodon.ieP This user is from outside of this forum
                                    psneeze@mastodon.ie
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #28

                                    @msbellows @agowa338 @Buster

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • tanyakaroli@expressional.socialT tanyakaroli@expressional.social shared this topic
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