the temu app will be studied for generations.
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel it’s like a shopping app, but targeted towards seven-year-olds.
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@AlSweigart @cabel Yes, for this is what “The Wolf of Wall Street” (the movie) taught us!
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel slot machines after you get 5 scatters
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel won't even let you use the damn app
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel@social.panic.com we really do live in the dumbest cyberpunk dystopia possible
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel Will it, though? Because how do you archive that shit?
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@Readinglover @mo @cabel it's the biggest competition Amazon has at this point afaict. So yeah, huge. Consider it the tiktok of shopping.
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Ugh. The amount of unnecessary work that went into all this unnecessary animation…
@argv_minus_one nah, it's probably mostly generated at this point @cabel
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel I guess we now know where all those devs laid off from King and Zynga ended up...
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel Do I never see stuff like this because I don't own a smartphone, but use a lap top ?
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
' the fuck is that ?
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel coming across this before I saw the text
Me: Can we have tumblr
Mom: We have tumblr at home
Tumblr at home: temu mastodon -
the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
I've seen casino slots less desperately flashy than this -
@cabel I guess we now know where all those devs laid off from King and Zynga ended up...
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel i picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel looks like the demo reel on a slot machine in vegas when it's not in use. Disgustingly amazing. Like a piece of shit you can't stop looking at because it looks vaguely like something else.
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@cabel trainpal (a UK rail booking app) does exactly the same bullshit
@Violet@chitter.xyz @cabel@social.panic.com this reeks like some rather unsavoury "gamification as a service" company, I’ve seen a few of them shoehorned into existing things but nothing this egregious
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@Violet@chitter.xyz @cabel@social.panic.com this reeks like some rather unsavoury "gamification as a service" company, I’ve seen a few of them shoehorned into existing things but nothing this egregious
@Violet@chitter.xyz @cabel@social.panic.com also if thats the "2026 easy mode" I don't want to know what the "2026 hard mode" is
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the temu app will be studied for generations.
i opened the app, and recorded this unedited, nearly two minute, launch sequence. it somehow just gets funnier and more absurd
@cabel not a unique observation but overhead someone the other day describing it as shopping for gambling addicts
