Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation.

[aud@fire.asta.lgbt]

@ricci@discuss.systems @lina@neuromatch.social @dev@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl and don't goose the basket what holds the eggs

[lina@neuromatch.social]

@aud
@dev @ricci @secretasianman

an egg saved is an egg for later

[aud@fire.asta.lgbt]

@lina@neuromatch.social @dev@discuss.systems @ricci@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl bit of an egg pincher, that one.

[lina@neuromatch.social]

@aud
@dev @ricci @secretasianman

me walking into the kitchen and seeing my partner making an omelette: "NOOOO MY ASSETS!"

[dsp@social.sdf.org]

@dev YES! As an owner of small company myself, i have been trying to talk to my shareholders about this terrible mistake. Goose was not valued (was nil) because she was written in a language without algebraic data types. While if Goose was written in Rust as it should, it would be Option<T>. That's why we moved to Ferrogoose and we are back on Q3 honking deliverables.

[aud@fire.asta.lgbt]

@lina@neuromatch.social @dev@discuss.systems @ricci@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl more like EGGSETS

cause theyr'e... anyway, sorry you're broke now

something something I ate the eggs that were in your icetirement account. Forgive me, they were so cold and valued, etc, etc...

[celesteh@hachyderm.io]

@dev its interesting to see the robotics bubble also get acknowledged. Those humanoid robots in the illustration have no use case. Roboticists fear the next AI winter will also be a robotics winter. Non-humanoid robots are actually useful, so maybe they'll escape it.

[damonwakes@mastodon.sdf.org]

@dev Why do I read "Goose was not valued" in exactly the same voice as "All my apes gone"?

[lina@neuromatch.social]

@aud
@dev @ricci @secretasianman

when companies are no longer producing value but not yet insolvent, it's time to hardboil

[godsoewilliam@ecoevo.social]

@dev It is a beautiful day in the village and you are a horrible goose.

[lina@neuromatch.social]

@aud
@dev @ricci @secretasianman

can we put on a conference where we pretend to be CEOs and just give batshit presentations to each other? every talk is a keynote including lightning keynotes and keynote workshops and keynote posters

[aud@fire.asta.lgbt]

@lina@neuromatch.social @dev@discuss.systems @ricci@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl YES

I'd invent a golden egg into that

[secretasianman@types.pl]

@aud @lina @dev @ricci bigger than before

[ricci@discuss.systems]

@lina @aud @dev @secretasianman you mean an NFT conference?

[joshmillard@mastodon.social]

@dev really failing to honor their heritage if they didn't also at some point show a blue egg and explain that it was bigger than before

[mayadev@tilde.zone]

@dev basic concepts from Capital, reinterpreted through MBAs using crayons and powerpoint templates

[lina@neuromatch.social]

@ricci
@aud @dev @secretasianman

but like a parody so that it's funny instead of depressing

[gapplepie1985@mastodon.social]

@dev good grief I hope that goose is ok

[aud@fire.asta.lgbt]

@lina@neuromatch.social @ricci@discuss.systems @dev@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl we should also not use intense UV lighting for our rave.

[dan@discuss.systems]

@dev I took a finance class in grad school to satisfy an obscure requirement and it was roughly on this level.

But with worse graphics.