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  3. Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation.

Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation.

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  • lina@neuromatch.socialL lina@neuromatch.social

    @aud
    @dev @ricci @secretasianman

    an egg saved is an egg for later

    lina@neuromatch.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
    lina@neuromatch.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
    lina@neuromatch.social
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #48

    @aud
    @dev @ricci @secretasianman

    me walking into the kitchen and seeing my partner making an omelette: "NOOOO MY ASSETS!"

    aud@fire.asta.lgbtA 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • dev@discuss.systemsD dev@discuss.systems

      Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation. Pulitzer-worthy

      https://group.softbank/media/Project/sbg/sbg/pdf/ir/investors/shareholders/2026/shareholders-meeting_46_05_en.pdf

      dsp@social.sdf.orgD This user is from outside of this forum
      dsp@social.sdf.orgD This user is from outside of this forum
      dsp@social.sdf.org
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #49

      @dev YES! As an owner of small company myself, i have been trying to talk to my shareholders about this terrible mistake. Goose was not valued (was nil) because she was written in a language without algebraic data types. While if Goose was written in Rust as it should, it would be Option<T>. That's why we moved to Ferrogoose and we are back on Q3 honking deliverables.

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • lina@neuromatch.socialL lina@neuromatch.social

        @aud
        @dev @ricci @secretasianman

        me walking into the kitchen and seeing my partner making an omelette: "NOOOO MY ASSETS!"

        aud@fire.asta.lgbtA This user is from outside of this forum
        aud@fire.asta.lgbtA This user is from outside of this forum
        aud@fire.asta.lgbt
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #50

        @lina@neuromatch.social @dev@discuss.systems @ricci@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl more like EGGSETS

        cause theyr'e... anyway, sorry you're broke now

        something something I ate the eggs that were in your icetirement account. Forgive me, they were so cold and valued, etc, etc...

        lina@neuromatch.socialL bonkers@nerdculture.deB 2 Replies Last reply
        0
        • dev@discuss.systemsD dev@discuss.systems

          Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation. Pulitzer-worthy

          https://group.softbank/media/Project/sbg/sbg/pdf/ir/investors/shareholders/2026/shareholders-meeting_46_05_en.pdf

          celesteh@hachyderm.ioC This user is from outside of this forum
          celesteh@hachyderm.ioC This user is from outside of this forum
          celesteh@hachyderm.io
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #51

          @dev its interesting to see the robotics bubble also get acknowledged. Those humanoid robots in the illustration have no use case. Roboticists fear the next AI winter will also be a robotics winter. Non-humanoid robots are actually useful, so maybe they'll escape it.

          brouhaha@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • dev@discuss.systemsD dev@discuss.systems

            Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation. Pulitzer-worthy

            https://group.softbank/media/Project/sbg/sbg/pdf/ir/investors/shareholders/2026/shareholders-meeting_46_05_en.pdf

            damonwakes@mastodon.sdf.orgD This user is from outside of this forum
            damonwakes@mastodon.sdf.orgD This user is from outside of this forum
            damonwakes@mastodon.sdf.org
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #52

            @dev Why do I read "Goose was not valued" in exactly the same voice as "All my apes gone"?

            annaspanner@bookstodon.comA 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • aud@fire.asta.lgbtA aud@fire.asta.lgbt

              @lina@neuromatch.social @dev@discuss.systems @ricci@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl more like EGGSETS

              cause theyr'e... anyway, sorry you're broke now

              something something I ate the eggs that were in your icetirement account. Forgive me, they were so cold and valued, etc, etc...

              lina@neuromatch.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
              lina@neuromatch.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
              lina@neuromatch.social
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #53

              @aud
              @dev @ricci @secretasianman

              when companies are no longer producing value but not yet insolvent, it's time to hardboil

              lina@neuromatch.socialL 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • dev@discuss.systemsD dev@discuss.systems

                Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation. Pulitzer-worthy

                https://group.softbank/media/Project/sbg/sbg/pdf/ir/investors/shareholders/2026/shareholders-meeting_46_05_en.pdf

                godsoewilliam@ecoevo.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                godsoewilliam@ecoevo.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                godsoewilliam@ecoevo.social
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #54

                @dev It is a beautiful day in the village and you are a horrible goose.

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • lina@neuromatch.socialL lina@neuromatch.social

                  @aud
                  @dev @ricci @secretasianman

                  when companies are no longer producing value but not yet insolvent, it's time to hardboil

                  lina@neuromatch.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                  lina@neuromatch.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                  lina@neuromatch.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #55

                  @aud
                  @dev @ricci @secretasianman

                  can we put on a conference where we pretend to be CEOs and just give batshit presentations to each other? every talk is a keynote including lightning keynotes and keynote workshops and keynote posters

                  aud@fire.asta.lgbtA ricci@discuss.systemsR giflian@techhub.socialG 3 Replies Last reply
                  0
                  • lina@neuromatch.socialL lina@neuromatch.social

                    @aud
                    @dev @ricci @secretasianman

                    can we put on a conference where we pretend to be CEOs and just give batshit presentations to each other? every talk is a keynote including lightning keynotes and keynote workshops and keynote posters

                    aud@fire.asta.lgbtA This user is from outside of this forum
                    aud@fire.asta.lgbtA This user is from outside of this forum
                    aud@fire.asta.lgbt
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #56

                    @lina@neuromatch.social @dev@discuss.systems @ricci@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl YES

                    I'd invent a golden egg into that

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • aud@fire.asta.lgbtA aud@fire.asta.lgbt

                      @lina@neuromatch.social @dev@discuss.systems @ricci@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl bit of an egg pincher, that one.

                      secretasianman@types.plS This user is from outside of this forum
                      secretasianman@types.plS This user is from outside of this forum
                      secretasianman@types.pl
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #57

                      @aud @lina @dev @ricci bigger than before

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • lina@neuromatch.socialL lina@neuromatch.social

                        @aud
                        @dev @ricci @secretasianman

                        can we put on a conference where we pretend to be CEOs and just give batshit presentations to each other? every talk is a keynote including lightning keynotes and keynote workshops and keynote posters

                        ricci@discuss.systemsR This user is from outside of this forum
                        ricci@discuss.systemsR This user is from outside of this forum
                        ricci@discuss.systems
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #58

                        @lina @aud @dev @secretasianman you mean an NFT conference?

                        lina@neuromatch.socialL 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • joshmillard@mastodon.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                          joshmillard@mastodon.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                          joshmillard@mastodon.social
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #59

                          @dev really failing to honor their heritage if they didn't also at some point show a blue egg and explain that it was bigger than before

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • dev@discuss.systemsD dev@discuss.systems

                            Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation. Pulitzer-worthy

                            https://group.softbank/media/Project/sbg/sbg/pdf/ir/investors/shareholders/2026/shareholders-meeting_46_05_en.pdf

                            mayadev@tilde.zoneM This user is from outside of this forum
                            mayadev@tilde.zoneM This user is from outside of this forum
                            mayadev@tilde.zone
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #60

                            @dev basic concepts from Capital, reinterpreted through MBAs using crayons and powerpoint templates

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • ricci@discuss.systemsR ricci@discuss.systems

                              @lina @aud @dev @secretasianman you mean an NFT conference?

                              lina@neuromatch.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                              lina@neuromatch.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                              lina@neuromatch.social
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #61

                              @ricci
                              @aud @dev @secretasianman

                              but like a parody so that it's funny instead of depressing

                              aud@fire.asta.lgbtA 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • G This user is from outside of this forum
                                G This user is from outside of this forum
                                gapplepie1985@mastodon.social
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #62

                                @dev good grief I hope that goose is ok

                                aud@fire.asta.lgbtA 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • lina@neuromatch.socialL lina@neuromatch.social

                                  @ricci
                                  @aud @dev @secretasianman

                                  but like a parody so that it's funny instead of depressing

                                  aud@fire.asta.lgbtA This user is from outside of this forum
                                  aud@fire.asta.lgbtA This user is from outside of this forum
                                  aud@fire.asta.lgbt
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #63

                                  @lina@neuromatch.social @ricci@discuss.systems @dev@discuss.systems @secretasianman@types.pl we should also not use intense UV lighting for our rave.

                                  lina@neuromatch.socialL 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • dev@discuss.systemsD dev@discuss.systems

                                    Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation. Pulitzer-worthy

                                    https://group.softbank/media/Project/sbg/sbg/pdf/ir/investors/shareholders/2026/shareholders-meeting_46_05_en.pdf

                                    dan@discuss.systemsD This user is from outside of this forum
                                    dan@discuss.systemsD This user is from outside of this forum
                                    dan@discuss.systems
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #64

                                    @dev I took a finance class in grad school to satisfy an obscure requirement and it was roughly on this level.

                                    But with worse graphics.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • G This user is from outside of this forum
                                      G This user is from outside of this forum
                                      gapplepie1985@mastodon.social
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #65

                                      @neoluddite @SnoopJ @regehr @dan @dev #ourgeesewillNOTbecooked

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • celesteh@hachyderm.ioC celesteh@hachyderm.io

                                        @ireneista @dev

                                        There's an Isaac Asimov story about this.

                                        funkula@goblin.campF This user is from outside of this forum
                                        funkula@goblin.campF This user is from outside of this forum
                                        funkula@goblin.camp
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #66

                                        @celesteh @ireneista @dev also shows up in @cstross 's singularity sky

                                        funkula@goblin.campF 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • dev@discuss.systemsD dev@discuss.systems

                                          Oh my god, these are real, actual slides from a SoftBank presentation. Pulitzer-worthy

                                          https://group.softbank/media/Project/sbg/sbg/pdf/ir/investors/shareholders/2026/shareholders-meeting_46_05_en.pdf

                                          ricci@discuss.systemsR This user is from outside of this forum
                                          ricci@discuss.systemsR This user is from outside of this forum
                                          ricci@discuss.systems
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #67

                                          @dev seize the fowl of production ⚒️

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          0
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