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  3. This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

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  • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

    @SamanthaJaneSmith @Sassinake @alice 😆

    alexadeswift@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
    alexadeswift@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
    alexadeswift@lgbtqia.space
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #187

    @benroyce

    Well that is one way to spend a penny!

    @SamanthaJaneSmith @Sassinake @alice

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

      @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

      because you don't have worms like our ancestors did. with that insight, what a blessed time we live in (in some regards)

      suzannealdrich@hachyderm.ioS This user is from outside of this forum
      suzannealdrich@hachyderm.ioS This user is from outside of this forum
      suzannealdrich@hachyderm.io
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #188

      @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice this reminds me of an interesting documentary on the effect of the hookworm for people in the US South, where they became known as stupid and lazy from the lethargic and mindfog effects of their infection:

      https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/article/how-a-worm-gave-the-south-a-bad-name/

      macacator@mastodon.socialM 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • suzannealdrich@hachyderm.ioS suzannealdrich@hachyderm.io

        @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice this reminds me of an interesting documentary on the effect of the hookworm for people in the US South, where they became known as stupid and lazy from the lethargic and mindfog effects of their infection:

        https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/article/how-a-worm-gave-the-south-a-bad-name/

        macacator@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
        macacator@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
        macacator@mastodon.social
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #189

        @suzannealdrich @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice I learned about the poop knife recently.

        With that being said, I would like to get an actual bidet, not just the attachment you add to a regular toilet.

        benroyce@mastodon.socialB alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 2 Replies Last reply
        0
        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

          @SleepyCatten tell me that's not the motorboat button 🤷🏼‍♀️

          sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS This user is from outside of this forum
          sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS This user is from outside of this forum
          sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtf
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #190

          @alice

          We definitely shouldn't be considered any kind of expert on deciphering symbols 😅

          Nor would we seek to tell somebody else that their interpretation of signs is wrong.

          If we told you what we see those as, it would tell you a lot about how our mind works 😅😶

          koalou@lgbtqia.spaceK 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • macacator@mastodon.socialM macacator@mastodon.social

            @suzannealdrich @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice I learned about the poop knife recently.

            With that being said, I would like to get an actual bidet, not just the attachment you add to a regular toilet.

            benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
            benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
            benroyce@mastodon.social
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #191

            @macacator @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

            the toilet attachment is easy and cheap

            a whole damn bidet means big $$$ and it assumes you have a massive bathroom

            macacator@mastodon.socialM 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

              This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

              - boob wash
              - water-park ride
              - options menu
              - multiplayer select

              - volume control
              - channel selector
              - smoking instructions?

              I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

              thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.spaceT This user is from outside of this forum
              thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.spaceT This user is from outside of this forum
              thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.space
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #192

              @alice I will admit, I always wanted one of those. Toilets, I mean.

              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                - boob wash
                - water-park ride
                - options menu
                - multiplayer select

                - volume control
                - channel selector
                - smoking instructions?

                I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                daswarkeinhuhn@netzkae.seD This user is from outside of this forum
                daswarkeinhuhn@netzkae.seD This user is from outside of this forum
                daswarkeinhuhn@netzkae.se
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #193

                @alice@lgbtqia.space uh nice it even got the "we're not in Kansas anymore" aka "follow the yellow piss road" mode on the Toto button

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • macacator@mastodon.socialM macacator@mastodon.social

                  @suzannealdrich @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice I learned about the poop knife recently.

                  With that being said, I would like to get an actual bidet, not just the attachment you add to a regular toilet.

                  alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                  alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                  alice@lgbtqia.space
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #194

                  @macacator wait, hol' up...poop knife?

                  You can't just drop that deuce and walk away without an explanation!

                  @suzannealdrich @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake

                  macacator@mastodon.socialM 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.spaceT thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.space

                    @alice I will admit, I always wanted one of those. Toilets, I mean.

                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.space
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #195

                    @thepurpleoctopus as someone who grew up with an outhouse, I can highly recommend indoor plumbing.

                    thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.spaceT 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                      @thepurpleoctopus as someone who grew up with an outhouse, I can highly recommend indoor plumbing.

                      thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.spaceT This user is from outside of this forum
                      thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.spaceT This user is from outside of this forum
                      thepurpleoctopus@lgbtqia.space
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #196

                      @alice Got me there. But I mean specifically one of these fancy ones. 🙂

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • djdarren@mendeddrum.orgD djdarren@mendeddrum.org

                        @alice I think volume control relates to pressure. The louder you set it, the more likely it is to jet wash your arsehole in two.

                        mysideishumanity@myprivate.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                        mysideishumanity@myprivate.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                        mysideishumanity@myprivate.social
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #197

                        @DJDarren @alice Or at least split your butt cheeks. Oh wait…

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                          This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                          - boob wash
                          - water-park ride
                          - options menu
                          - multiplayer select

                          - volume control
                          - channel selector
                          - smoking instructions?

                          I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                          mysideishumanity@myprivate.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                          mysideishumanity@myprivate.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                          mysideishumanity@myprivate.social
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #198

                          @alice Thank you for turning this example of "universally-understandable iconography that averts language issues" into such a fun post! 😄 😌

                          niels@social.data.coopN 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                            This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                            - boob wash
                            - water-park ride
                            - options menu
                            - multiplayer select

                            - volume control
                            - channel selector
                            - smoking instructions?

                            I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                            kowalski@chaos.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                            kowalski@chaos.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                            kowalski@chaos.social
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #199

                            …at my times we had only three shells …!

                            @alice

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                              This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                              - boob wash
                              - water-park ride
                              - options menu
                              - multiplayer select

                              - volume control
                              - channel selector
                              - smoking instructions?

                              I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                              inchulk@mastodon.greenI This user is from outside of this forum
                              inchulk@mastodon.greenI This user is from outside of this forum
                              inchulk@mastodon.green
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #200

                              @alice That is a nice simple control panel you have there. First trip to Tokyo, there were 3 control panels, it felt like piloting a 747...
                              Took a couple of days to work out all the options.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                @macacator wait, hol' up...poop knife?

                                You can't just drop that deuce and walk away without an explanation!

                                @suzannealdrich @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake

                                macacator@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                macacator@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                macacator@mastodon.social
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #201

                                @alice @suzannealdrich @benroyce @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake sometimes, when you ate one too many potatoes, your body will churn out a recycled burrito the size of a Sam's club sausage. You look at it in its unbroken abomination and wonder how you're going to flush that bad boy.

                                /the poop knife has entered the chat

                                You grab that knife, reach on down there and turn that sausage log into a sushi roll with a few swift chops. Now you can safely flush using that bucket you poured earlier.

                                alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

                                  @alice

                                  Well, my disgust/apprehension is moot anyway.

                                  We don't have them in Canada, and it doesn't look like I'll be travelling anytime soon...

                                  endlessmason@hachyderm.ioE This user is from outside of this forum
                                  endlessmason@hachyderm.ioE This user is from outside of this forum
                                  endlessmason@hachyderm.io
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #202

                                  @Sassinake @alice
                                  This one is fifty loonies. It doesn't heat the water or noth'n, but it's a start and you can take it with you when you move.

                                  https://www.amazon.ca/PIKETS-butt-fountain/dp/B09QPDWXWC?affiliate_id=nah+this+is+fedi+lmao

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                                    @ColesStreetPothole @Sassinake @alice

                                    you're both right

                                    1. it's easier and cheaper than ever before to install a bidet on your toilet

                                    2. bidets are until very recently associated with the class divide

                                    mrbirch@beige.partyM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    mrbirch@beige.partyM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    mrbirch@beige.party
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #203

                                    @benroyce @ColesStreetPothole @Sassinake @alice
                                    The best bidets need electrical power, for example to heat the water and to air dry. That’s the challenge for broad use, as most houses won’t have power outlets near a toilet.

                                    benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                                      @macacator @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

                                      the toilet attachment is easy and cheap

                                      a whole damn bidet means big $$$ and it assumes you have a massive bathroom

                                      macacator@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                      macacator@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                      macacator@mastodon.social
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #204

                                      @benroyce @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice it's a luxury I want but can't afford because a white man with brain worms laid us all off. Like, just looked at that machine running fine and shit himself from all the impotent rage in his heart and said: "not on my watch. "

                                      All I have left are dreams of getting my hairy ass washed after dropping off the browns to the spooper bowl.

                                      benroyce@mastodon.socialB alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 2 Replies Last reply
                                      0
                                      • mrbirch@beige.partyM mrbirch@beige.party

                                        @benroyce @ColesStreetPothole @Sassinake @alice
                                        The best bidets need electrical power, for example to heat the water and to air dry. That’s the challenge for broad use, as most houses won’t have power outlets near a toilet.

                                        benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                        benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                        benroyce@mastodon.social
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #205

                                        @MrBirch @ColesStreetPothole @Sassinake @alice

                                        good point

                                        the plumbing seems relatively straightfoward. but the electric work is a next level

                                        well, a shot of cold water up the bum would do wonders to wake you up in the morning

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • macacator@mastodon.socialM macacator@mastodon.social

                                          @benroyce @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice it's a luxury I want but can't afford because a white man with brain worms laid us all off. Like, just looked at that machine running fine and shit himself from all the impotent rage in his heart and said: "not on my watch. "

                                          All I have left are dreams of getting my hairy ass washed after dropping off the browns to the spooper bowl.

                                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          benroyce@mastodon.social
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #206

                                          @macacator @suzannealdrich @slothrop @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice 😂

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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