If a baguette could move, how would it move?
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@at You're not the first person to reply with this

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Before you answer 3 - I made 3 more baguettes that don't distort
(plus a snake one because I felt like it)@sheepfilms definitely 7 ; as a french man i know that a baguette cannot bend without losing bits of crust, and a crust is part of the identity of a baguette, so it had to be 3 🧐
But given the alternatives, 7 is more really more like it. Give it arms and a mouth to whistle, and it will go to the bakery, fetch a tiny baguette for breakfast and bring it home by holding it under its arm, because this is the way

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If a baguette could move, how would it move? Give your reasoning pls.
(this is an old GIF from the archive, posting it here finally)@sheepfilms 2, naturally, as the origin of the name "Bah-Ghett" stems from the sound its two legs make as it runs.
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If a baguette could move, how would it move? Give your reasoning pls.
(this is an old GIF from the archive, posting it here finally)@sheepfilms 1 and 4 are basically the same (slug) - where’s the slithering snake?
Edit: There it is.. #8
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@sheepfilms 1 and 4 are basically the same (slug) - where’s the slithering snake?
Edit: There it is.. #8
@photovince 1 is a worm and 4 is a caterpillar
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Before you answer 3 - I made 3 more baguettes that don't distort
(plus a snake one because I felt like it)@sheepfilms 5, as it maintains form and has a rhythm that allows it to protect from natural predators.
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Before you answer 3 - I made 3 more baguettes that don't distort
(plus a snake one because I felt like it)@sheepfilms 1, it is natural to the inner structure of the baguette, and can be done with minimal tearing
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If a baguette could move, how would it move? Give your reasoning pls.
(this is an old GIF from the archive, posting it here finally)@sheepfilms I think it would slither like a snake. Possibly a sidewinder
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Before you answer 3 - I made 3 more baguettes that don't distort
(plus a snake one because I felt like it)@sheepfilms I still like 3 - that end over end thing is nice and satisfying, and you're not stuck with one direction of movement
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If a baguette could move, how would it move? Give your reasoning pls.
(this is an old GIF from the archive, posting it here finally)@sheepfilms@mastodon.social oh you’re the original author of this gif?
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@sheepfilms@mastodon.social oh you’re the original author of this gif?
@xarvos yes

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If a baguette could move, how would it move? Give your reasoning pls.
(this is an old GIF from the archive, posting it here finally)@sheepfilms All of these are viable, the baguette chooses it's gait based on how fast it wants to go and the surface it wants to traverse, just like a horse.
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Before you answer 3 - I made 3 more baguettes that don't distort
(plus a snake one because I felt like it)@sheepfilms I'm happy we're thinking about the big questions in life today.
I'm torn between 1 and 4.
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Before you answer 3 - I made 3 more baguettes that don't distort
(plus a snake one because I felt like it)@sheepfilms Thinking more about this, we are missing important information. Are we talking about a proper bakery baguette or these horrors from the supermarket for whom 8 would not result in texture change?
Also -- where does it live?
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Before you answer 3 - I made 3 more baguettes that don't distort
(plus a snake one because I felt like it)@sheepfilms 1. Any fast movements are going to damage the crust. I think 1 is probably the easiest type of motion to execute extremely slowly. It probably moves about 1cm a week.
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If a baguette could move, how would it move? Give your reasoning pls.
(this is an old GIF from the archive, posting it here finally)What an utterly absurd question "If a baguette could move, how would it move?"
Obviously it's #4!
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If a baguette could move, how would it move? Give your reasoning pls.
(this is an old GIF from the archive, posting it here finally)@sheepfilms But they *can* move. They use mind control to coerce a Frenchman to carry them.
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@sheepfilms Thinking more about this, we are missing important information. Are we talking about a proper bakery baguette or these horrors from the supermarket for whom 8 would not result in texture change?
Also -- where does it live?
@transitionalaspect I don't have an answer for your questions. You can decide!
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Before you answer 3 - I made 3 more baguettes that don't distort
(plus a snake one because I felt like it)@sheepfilms 3 and 7 seem the most baguette-y
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If a baguette could move, how would it move? Give your reasoning pls.
(this is an old GIF from the archive, posting it here finally)@sheepfilms all of these combined, it is French after all!