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  3. This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

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  • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

    @alice

    Well, my disgust/apprehension is moot anyway.

    We don't have them in Canada, and it doesn't look like I'll be travelling anytime soon...

    benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
    benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
    benroyce@mastodon.social
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #74

    @Sassinake @alice

    i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

    they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

    toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

    while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

    but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS space_burger_steve@mstdn.caS gentlemantech@cyberplace.socialG samanthajanesmith@lgbtqia.spaceS 5 Replies Last reply
    0
    • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

      @Sassinake @alice

      i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

      they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

      toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

      while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

      but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
      alice@lgbtqia.space
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #75

      @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

      @Sassinake

      perrin42@mastodon.socialP benroyce@mastodon.socialB jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC 4 Replies Last reply
      0
      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

        This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

        - boob wash
        - water-park ride
        - options menu
        - multiplayer select

        - volume control
        - channel selector
        - smoking instructions?

        I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

        sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS This user is from outside of this forum
        sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS This user is from outside of this forum
        sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtf
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #76

        @alice Boob wash 🤭

        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

          @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

          @Sassinake

          perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
          perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
          perrin42@mastodon.social
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #77

          @alice @benroyce @Sassinake

          OMG, that is so bad. 🤣🤣🤣

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

            @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

            @Sassinake

            benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
            benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
            benroyce@mastodon.social
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #78

            @alice @Sassinake

            i don't know that brand...

            ohhh

            😵‍💫

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

              This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

              - boob wash
              - water-park ride
              - options menu
              - multiplayer select

              - volume control
              - channel selector
              - smoking instructions?

              I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

              diz@thegayagenda.fansD This user is from outside of this forum
              diz@thegayagenda.fansD This user is from outside of this forum
              diz@thegayagenda.fans
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #79

              @alice@lgbtqia.space woozy hamburger menu ​​

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtf

                @alice Boob wash 🤭

                alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                alice@lgbtqia.space
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #80

                @SleepyCatten tell me that's not the motorboat button 🤷🏼‍♀️

                sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                  @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

                  @Sassinake

                  jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ This user is from outside of this forum
                  jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ This user is from outside of this forum
                  jrdepriest@infosec.exchange
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #81

                  @alice @benroyce @Sassinake

                  At a hemorrhoid haver, I feel this one.

                  We buy wet wipes in bulk.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                    @Sassinake @alice

                    i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

                    they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

                    toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

                    while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

                    but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

                    sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS This user is from outside of this forum
                    sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS This user is from outside of this forum
                    sandorspruit@mastodon.nl
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #82

                    @benroyce @Sassinake @alice Euh, I am going to regret asking this but, euh, what’s a Dutch poop shelf? 🤔😬

                    benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                      This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                      - boob wash
                      - water-park ride
                      - options menu
                      - multiplayer select

                      - volume control
                      - channel selector
                      - smoking instructions?

                      I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                      joe@toot.worksJ This user is from outside of this forum
                      joe@toot.worksJ This user is from outside of this forum
                      joe@toot.works
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #83

                      @alice I used a bidet in a random burger place that had "Stop button doesn't work. Flush to stop." written in english above the controls. It makes me wonder what happened before they printed that label.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                        alice@lgbtqia.space
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #84

                        @1000millimeter the boob wash is for everyone with a butt, and the water park is for vagina-owners.

                        @mercurial

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS sandorspruit@mastodon.nl

                          @benroyce @Sassinake @alice Euh, I am going to regret asking this but, euh, what’s a Dutch poop shelf? 🤔😬

                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                          benroyce@mastodon.social
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #85

                          @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

                          people would want to look at their poop for health reasons. so you poop on a shelf in the bowl for inspection

                          it's fading away, it's mostly historical and a curiousity nowadays in old houses. new builds in the netherlands don't have it. and it's not unique to the netherlands

                          sassinake@mastodon.socialS alice@lgbtqia.spaceA morton@kolektiva.socialM 3 Replies Last reply
                          0
                          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                            This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                            - boob wash
                            - water-park ride
                            - options menu
                            - multiplayer select

                            - volume control
                            - channel selector
                            - smoking instructions?

                            I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                            simonwilliamson@mastodon.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                            simonwilliamson@mastodon.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                            simonwilliamson@mastodon.world
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #86

                            @alice the third one looks like a fountain riding function, the next one a road (in case you want to go for a drive) and the last is for when you want to see a ghost.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                              This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                              - boob wash
                              - water-park ride
                              - options menu
                              - multiplayer select

                              - volume control
                              - channel selector
                              - smoking instructions?

                              I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                              th@social.v.stT This user is from outside of this forum
                              th@social.v.stT This user is from outside of this forum
                              th@social.v.st
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #87

                              @alice we added a label after a friend spent several minutes trying to turn off the water park ride

                              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA msbellows@c.imM 2 Replies Last reply
                              0
                              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                                - boob wash
                                - water-park ride
                                - options menu
                                - multiplayer select

                                - volume control
                                - channel selector
                                - smoking instructions?

                                I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                                iwillyeah@mastodon.ieI This user is from outside of this forum
                                iwillyeah@mastodon.ieI This user is from outside of this forum
                                iwillyeah@mastodon.ie
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #88

                                @alice what happens you page the dude on the right? Or is that the button for buttplug installation?

                                alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                  alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                  alice@lgbtqia.space
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #89

                                  @cynthiarose I read your reply, and for a brief moment was like "mine was a joke. That has to be a joke...right? Do half of men really wipe that hard with cheap toilet paper?"

                                  💁🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ (I can be dense sometimes)

                                  @benroyce @Sassinake

                                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                                    @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

                                    people would want to look at their poop for health reasons. so you poop on a shelf in the bowl for inspection

                                    it's fading away, it's mostly historical and a curiousity nowadays in old houses. new builds in the netherlands don't have it. and it's not unique to the netherlands

                                    sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                    sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                    sassinake@mastodon.social
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #90

                                    @benroyce @sandorspruit @alice

                                    (why did I have to put my 2c in?)

                                    benroyce@mastodon.socialB alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 2 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                      @cynthiarose I read your reply, and for a brief moment was like "mine was a joke. That has to be a joke...right? Do half of men really wipe that hard with cheap toilet paper?"

                                      💁🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ (I can be dense sometimes)

                                      @benroyce @Sassinake

                                      benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                      benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                      benroyce@mastodon.social
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #91

                                      @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                                      real men give themselves anal fissures!

                                      show the poop who is boss!

                                      if you're not wiping with sandpaper quality toilet paper you're WEAK!

                                      (/s)

                                      🥴

                                      sassinake@mastodon.socialS perrin42@mastodon.socialP a_minion@mastodon.socialA david@fouroclockfarms.clubD 4 Replies Last reply
                                      0
                                      • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                                        @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

                                        people would want to look at their poop for health reasons. so you poop on a shelf in the bowl for inspection

                                        it's fading away, it's mostly historical and a curiousity nowadays in old houses. new builds in the netherlands don't have it. and it's not unique to the netherlands

                                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alice@lgbtqia.space
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #92

                                        @benroyce I'd never heard of that...

                                        Huh, TIL 🤷🏼‍♀️

                                        @sandorspruit @Sassinake

                                        sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS alexadeswift@lgbtqia.spaceA 2 Replies Last reply
                                        0
                                        • th@social.v.stT th@social.v.st

                                          @alice we added a label after a friend spent several minutes trying to turn off the water park ride

                                          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                          alice@lgbtqia.space
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #93

                                          @th Wild Waves ain't got nothin' on this ride.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          0
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