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FARVEL BIG TECH
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  3. This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

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  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

    @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

    @Sassinake

    colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC This user is from outside of this forum
    colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC This user is from outside of this forum
    colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.network
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #101

    @alice @benroyce @Sassinake I am in Canada right now and can report every toilet in my sister's house has a bidet feature (Tushy brand). 🇨🇦💩🚽

    sassinake@mastodon.socialS 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

      @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose

      But the alternative is worse:

      Where guys talk themselves into thinking touching anywhere 'around there' is 'gay', so they don't wipe - or wash - their asses.

      like... AT ALL.

      benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
      benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
      benroyce@mastodon.social
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #102

      @Sassinake @alice @cynthiarose

      just MAGA toilet habits

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

        @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

        I use steel wool.

        benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
        benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
        benroyce@mastodon.social
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #103

        @Perrin42 @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

        LOOK HERE, A REAL MAN!

        😆

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

          @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose

          But the alternative is worse:

          Where guys talk themselves into thinking touching anywhere 'around there' is 'gay', so they don't wipe - or wash - their asses.

          like... AT ALL.

          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
          alice@lgbtqia.space
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #104

          @Sassinake my straight and bi girlfriends have told me horror stories. I've been lucky; all the guys I've been with have been amenable to wiping.

          @benroyce @cynthiarose

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

            @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

            I use steel wool.

            perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
            perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
            perrin42@mastodon.social
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #105

            @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

            To keep it clean and reuse it I soak it in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice.

            benroyce@mastodon.socialB alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 2 Replies Last reply
            0
            • colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.network

              @alice @benroyce @Sassinake I am in Canada right now and can report every toilet in my sister's house has a bidet feature (Tushy brand). 🇨🇦💩🚽

              sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
              sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
              sassinake@mastodon.social
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #106

              @ColesStreetPothole @alice @benroyce

              yeah, I doubt we live in the same Class.

              i remember visiting with some Français and they had them imported and installed in their nice house in Outremont.

              colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

                @sandorspruit @alice @benroyce

                I mean... feces are a good indicator for health...

                msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                msbellows@c.im
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #107

                @Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice @benroyce I think they mainly were checking for worms.

                Really.

                (And no, this is not a Diet of Worms joke. I'm more mature than that.)

                benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

                  @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                  To keep it clean and reuse it I soak it in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice.

                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                  benroyce@mastodon.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #108

                  @Perrin42 @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                  okay okay calm down 😂

                  perrin42@mastodon.socialP 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

                    @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                    To keep it clean and reuse it I soak it in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice.

                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.space
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #109

                    @Perrin42 I've heard tobasco adds a nice finish to it.

                    @benroyce @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                    perrin42@mastodon.socialP 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • th@social.v.stT th@social.v.st

                      @alice we added a label after a friend spent several minutes trying to turn off the water park ride

                      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                      msbellows@c.im
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #110

                      @th @alice What's the difference between boob wash and water park?

                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                        This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                        - boob wash
                        - water-park ride
                        - options menu
                        - multiplayer select

                        - volume control
                        - channel selector
                        - smoking instructions?

                        I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                        fionasboots@tech.lgbtF This user is from outside of this forum
                        fionasboots@tech.lgbtF This user is from outside of this forum
                        fionasboots@tech.lgbt
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #111

                        @alice
                        It's nice to see modern appliances promoting 80s band Toto 😁

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                          @Perrin42 @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                          okay okay calm down 😂

                          perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                          perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                          perrin42@mastodon.social
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #112

                          @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                          It's hard to be calm when you wipe your behind with steel wool soaked in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice. It's also very hard to sit comfortably.

                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

                            @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                            I use steel wool.

                            colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC This user is from outside of this forum
                            colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC This user is from outside of this forum
                            colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.network
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #113

                            @Perrin42 @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
                            Camopaper™️: Toilet paper for men! It's tactical!

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                              @Perrin42 I've heard tobasco adds a nice finish to it.

                              @benroyce @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                              perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                              perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                              perrin42@mastodon.social
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #114

                              @alice @benroyce @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                              Ooh, I'll have to try that. I've seen what tobasco sauce does to old pennies.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                @Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice @benroyce I think they mainly were checking for worms.

                                Really.

                                (And no, this is not a Diet of Worms joke. I'm more mature than that.)

                                benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                benroyce@mastodon.social
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #115

                                @msbellows @Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice

                                absolutely

                                it's hard for the modern mind to contemplate the kinds of shit (pun intended) our ancestors had to go through that we are completely oblivious too

                                it's why there is so many antivax people. they are embarrassingly unaware as to why it's so important and what they're risking. their ancestors would hit them over the head with a frying pan if they heard that antivax shit, they were acutely aware of what a godsend vaccinations are

                                msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                  @th @alice What's the difference between boob wash and water park?

                                  alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                  alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                  alice@lgbtqia.space
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #116

                                  @msbellows the water park is for people with ponytails, the boob-wash is gender neutral.

                                  @th

                                  msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

                                    @alice
                                    I am not flooding my bits with anything coming OUT of the loo.

                                    Nope.

                                    morton@kolektiva.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    morton@kolektiva.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    morton@kolektiva.social
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #117

                                    @Sassinake @alice A bidet is a bidet, and a toilet is a toilet. If you don't have room in the bathroom for a bidet, you install a bidet ta. I have a bidetta.

                                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA holly@social.v.stH 2 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS sandorspruit@mastodon.nl

                                      @alice @benroyce @Sassinake Ooh, I see. Nice idea right, inspect the goods before you flush them.

                                      emily_rugburn@lgbtqia.spaceE This user is from outside of this forum
                                      emily_rugburn@lgbtqia.spaceE This user is from outside of this forum
                                      emily_rugburn@lgbtqia.space
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #118

                                      @sandorspruit @alice @benroyce @Sassinake its like...none of you have ibs hahahaha

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                                        @Sassinake @alice

                                        i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

                                        they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

                                        toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

                                        while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

                                        but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

                                        space_burger_steve@mstdn.caS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        space_burger_steve@mstdn.caS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        space_burger_steve@mstdn.ca
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #119

                                        @benroyce @Sassinake @alice Um, we totally have bidets in Canada. I've never seen one in the wild, but Canadian stores sell them, they're not outlawed or anything. I've noticed the uptick in popularity too, but I haven't seen any hard data on how much of that is American vs Canadian. Sassinake, please don't try to make anal hydrophobia an identifying trait for Canadians, we don't need that kind of reputation. 😜 But I don't mind if you want to say that's how it is in Saskatchewan, or whatever*.

                                        *Please interpret this as friendly, jocular ribbing, I don't actually want to beef. 😅

                                        benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

                                          @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                                          It's hard to be calm when you wipe your behind with steel wool soaked in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice. It's also very hard to sit comfortably.

                                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          benroyce@mastodon.social
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #120

                                          @Perrin42 @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                                          uh...

                                          perrin42@mastodon.socialP 1 Reply Last reply
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