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FARVEL BIG TECH
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  3. This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

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  • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

    @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

    That's why I wear barbed-wire underwear. It really doesn't help at all, and in fact makes things much worse.

    Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

    perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
    perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
    perrin42@mastodon.social
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #125

    @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

    (I was going to go for chainmail underwear, for the pinchingness and hairpullingness, but the barbed wire seemed tougher.)

    benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

      @Sassinake @alice

      i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

      they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

      toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

      while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

      but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

      gentlemantech@cyberplace.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
      gentlemantech@cyberplace.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
      gentlemantech@cyberplace.social
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #126

      @benroyce @Sassinake @alice Asian bum guns are the best. Squeaky clean and no paper waste

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.network

        @Sassinake @alice @benroyce They are $49 at Walmart in the U.S. so I don't know.
        https://www.walmart.com/ip/TUSHY-Fresh-Bidet-Ultra-Slim-Toilet-Seat-Attachment-Self-Cleaning-Hygienic-Nozzle-White-Bamboo/5303527810?wmlspartner=wlpa&selectedSellerId=101044177&adid=22222222223000000000&wmlspartner=wmtlabs&wl0=e&wl1=o&wl2=m&wl3=10352200394&wl4=pla-1103028060075&wl5=87545&wl6=&wl7=&wl10=Walmart&wl11=Online&wl12=5303527810_10001063556&wl14=tushy%20bidet%20toilet%20seats%20website&veh=sem&msclkid=1f0b19cfb3f21bca8f3b73b83849b5fb&gclid=1f0b19cfb3f21bca8f3b73b83849b5fb&gclsrc=3p.ds

        sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
        sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
        sassinake@mastodon.social
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #127

        @ColesStreetPothole @alice @benroyce

        plus the space, the plumber, and the mortgage...

        colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

          @Iwillyeah I think it's like the player indicator on a Wiimote.

          You know, for party games 💁🏼‍♀️

          iwillyeah@mastodon.ieI This user is from outside of this forum
          iwillyeah@mastodon.ieI This user is from outside of this forum
          iwillyeah@mastodon.ie
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #128

          @alice that's why I never lock the door

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

            @ColesStreetPothole @alice @benroyce

            plus the space, the plumber, and the mortgage...

            colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC This user is from outside of this forum
            colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC This user is from outside of this forum
            colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.network
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #129

            @Sassinake @alice @benroyce 😆 I installed the one at my house using a single adjustable wrench in ten minutes.

            sassinake@mastodon.socialS 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
              alice@lgbtqia.space
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #130

              @1000millimeter ooo, that might be a good marketing campaign for Americans!

              @mercurial

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

                @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                (I was going to go for chainmail underwear, for the pinchingness and hairpullingness, but the barbed wire seemed tougher.)

                benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                benroyce@mastodon.social
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #131

                @Perrin42 @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake 😂

                perrin42@mastodon.socialP 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                  @Space_Burger_Steve @Sassinake @alice

                  zero doubt

                  when i said "i don't know about canada" i didn't mean "that barbaric place of unclean bums" i meant "i'm american but i'm not going to be that stereotypical arrogant asshole that speaks on behalf of experiences and situations in other countries"

                  i would assume bidet use in canada is prevalent. but i just don't know, so i won't speak on canada's behalf

                  is canada as in-sink garbage disposal mad as the usa too?

                  sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                  sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                  sassinake@mastodon.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #132

                  @benroyce @Space_Burger_Steve @alice

                  it had its moment, in the 80s or 90s

                  bidets were a luxury imported by upper class Europeans, mostly.

                  sassinake@mastodon.socialS 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                    @msbellows the water park is for people with ponytails, the boob-wash is gender neutral.

                    @th

                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                    msbellows@c.im
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #133

                    @alice @th D'oh! Now that you explain it, it's obvious. I apologize for wasting your time with a dumb question.

                    th@social.v.stT alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 2 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.network

                      @Sassinake @alice @benroyce 😆 I installed the one at my house using a single adjustable wrench in ten minutes.

                      sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                      sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                      sassinake@mastodon.social
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #134

                      @ColesStreetPothole @alice @benroyce

                      Why did you mention your sister, then, if you have you own in your huge bathroom in your own house?

                      colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                        @Perrin42 @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake 😂

                        perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                        perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                        perrin42@mastodon.social
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #135

                        @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                        That really makes me wonder now about the whole "chainmail bikini" thing. Can you imagine the pinching? And hair pulling? I think it'd be better to get stabbed.

                        perrin42@mastodon.socialP sassinake@mastodon.socialS alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 3 Replies Last reply
                        0
                        • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                          @msbellows @Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice

                          absolutely

                          it's hard for the modern mind to contemplate the kinds of shit (pun intended) our ancestors had to go through that we are completely oblivious too

                          it's why there is so many antivax people. they are embarrassingly unaware as to why it's so important and what they're risking. their ancestors would hit them over the head with a frying pan if they heard that antivax shit, they were acutely aware of what a godsend vaccinations are

                          msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                          msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                          msbellows@c.im
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #136

                          @benroyce @Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice On the other hand, the people that invented the Dutch toilet shelf would have been HUGE fans of Ivermectin (a worm medicine).

                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

                            @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                            That really makes me wonder now about the whole "chainmail bikini" thing. Can you imagine the pinching? And hair pulling? I think it'd be better to get stabbed.

                            perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                            perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                            perrin42@mastodon.social
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #137

                            @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                            How did this conversation get from bidets to chainmail underwear? Oh, right.

                            amalia22@mastodon.socialA alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 2 Replies Last reply
                            0
                            • perrin42@mastodon.socialP perrin42@mastodon.social

                              @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake

                              That really makes me wonder now about the whole "chainmail bikini" thing. Can you imagine the pinching? And hair pulling? I think it'd be better to get stabbed.

                              sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                              sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                              sassinake@mastodon.social
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #138

                              @Perrin42 @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose

                              somehow, I don't think the boys imagining chaimail bikinies are imagining anything short of baby-smooth

                              perrin42@mastodon.socialP 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                @alice @th D'oh! Now that you explain it, it's obvious. I apologize for wasting your time with a dumb question.

                                th@social.v.stT This user is from outside of this forum
                                th@social.v.stT This user is from outside of this forum
                                th@social.v.st
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #139

                                @msbellows everyone is allowed on the water park ride if they want to give it a try. @alice isn't your real boss.

                                alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                  @benroyce I'd never heard of that...

                                  Huh, TIL 🤷🏼‍♀️

                                  @sandorspruit @Sassinake

                                  alexadeswift@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                  alexadeswift@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                  alexadeswift@lgbtqia.space
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #140

                                  @alice

                                  Germany used to have them as well!

                                  @benroyce @sandorspruit @Sassinake

                                  sassinake@mastodon.socialS 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                                    @alice

                                    "options menu"

                                    common error

                                    if you look carefully the button clearly indicates "contemplate the passage of time on the timescale of geological layers." the button means you want to be undisturbed for a bit

                                    which is what we do while sitting on the toilet

                                    or at least i do, don't call me out

                                    isn't this the root behavior and linguistic source of the word "analysis"?

                                    🤭

                                    acb@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                                    acb@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                                    acb@mastodon.social
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #141

                                    @benroyce @alice Or, as spiritual folks* refer to the practice, excremeditation

                                    * The Church of the SubGenius

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

                                      @Perrin42 @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose

                                      somehow, I don't think the boys imagining chaimail bikinies are imagining anything short of baby-smooth

                                      perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                                      perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                                      perrin42@mastodon.social
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #142

                                      @Sassinake @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose

                                      You're probably right. But there's still the pinching. <shudders> That would be awful regardless of gender.

                                      perrin42@mastodon.socialP 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

                                        @benroyce @Space_Burger_Steve @alice

                                        it had its moment, in the 80s or 90s

                                        bidets were a luxury imported by upper class Europeans, mostly.

                                        sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        sassinake@mastodon.social
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #143

                                        @benroyce @Space_Burger_Steve @alice

                                        I mean, most Canadians rent, and only a certain class can afford them.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                          @benroyce @Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice On the other hand, the people that invented the Dutch toilet shelf would have been HUGE fans of Ivermectin (a worm medicine).

                                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          benroyce@mastodon.social
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #144

                                          @msbellows @Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice

                                          ivermectin is absolutely valid

                                          ...for worms, not viruses

                                          one of the reasons that whole myth took off is doctors noted people with covid in areas with high worm loads would get somewhat better with ivermectin

                                          because they're now getting more sustenance from their food and their immune system can focus elsewhere

                                          but obviously, if you don't have worms, ivermectin doesn't do anything for covid

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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