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  3. This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

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  • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

    @alice

    "options menu"

    common error

    if you look carefully the button clearly indicates "contemplate the passage of time on the timescale of geological layers." the button means you want to be undisturbed for a bit

    which is what we do while sitting on the toilet

    or at least i do, don't call me out

    isn't this the root behavior and linguistic source of the word "analysis"?

    🤭

    viq@social.hackerspace.plV This user is from outside of this forum
    viq@social.hackerspace.plV This user is from outside of this forum
    viq@social.hackerspace.pl
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #67

    @benroyce
    "While contributing to creation of said layers" 😂
    @alice

    benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

      @Sassinake I wouldn't drink out of it like a water fountain, but it's cleaner than most butts are after pooping 💁🏼‍♀️

      sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
      sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
      sassinake@mastodon.social
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #68

      @alice

      Well, my disgust/apprehension is moot anyway.

      We don't have them in Canada, and it doesn't look like I'll be travelling anytime soon...

      benroyce@mastodon.socialB endlessmason@hachyderm.ioE 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • viq@social.hackerspace.plV viq@social.hackerspace.pl

        @benroyce
        "While contributing to creation of said layers" 😂
        @alice

        benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
        benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
        benroyce@mastodon.social
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #69

        @viq @alice

        just a little archeological contribution

        🤭

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

          @lispi314 never used one like that before, but I have an after-market add-on one on my toilet at home, and it's lovely (except in winter when it literally freezes your bits off, but it's a better wake-me-up than espresso).

          @lukeharby

          lispi314@udongein.xyzL This user is from outside of this forum
          lispi314@udongein.xyzL This user is from outside of this forum
          lispi314@udongein.xyz
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #70

          @alice@lgbtqia.space @lukeharby@infosec.exchange In my country, cold mains water is a basic fact of winter, so I got myself one that also had a hot water hookup.

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

            @achim I just swear a lot at the wall box.

            achim@mastodon.weindl.bizA This user is from outside of this forum
            achim@mastodon.weindl.bizA This user is from outside of this forum
            achim@mastodon.weindl.biz
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #71

            @alice

            Ah, the John Spartan method 🙃

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

              This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

              - boob wash
              - water-park ride
              - options menu
              - multiplayer select

              - volume control
              - channel selector
              - smoking instructions?

              I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

              katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
              katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
              katzenberger@tldr.nettime.org
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #72

              @alice

              There must be a reason why you stayed silent about the Toto football bets button?

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                - boob wash
                - water-park ride
                - options menu
                - multiplayer select

                - volume control
                - channel selector
                - smoking instructions?

                I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                gimulnautti@mastodon.greenG This user is from outside of this forum
                gimulnautti@mastodon.greenG This user is from outside of this forum
                gimulnautti@mastodon.green
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #73

                @alice Japanese toilets 😊

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

                  @alice

                  Well, my disgust/apprehension is moot anyway.

                  We don't have them in Canada, and it doesn't look like I'll be travelling anytime soon...

                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                  benroyce@mastodon.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #74

                  @Sassinake @alice

                  i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

                  they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

                  toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

                  while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

                  but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

                  alice@lgbtqia.spaceA sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS space_burger_steve@mstdn.caS gentlemantech@cyberplace.socialG samanthajanesmith@lgbtqia.spaceS 5 Replies Last reply
                  0
                  • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                    @Sassinake @alice

                    i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

                    they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

                    toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

                    while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

                    but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.space
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #75

                    @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

                    @Sassinake

                    perrin42@mastodon.socialP benroyce@mastodon.socialB jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC 4 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                      This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                      - boob wash
                      - water-park ride
                      - options menu
                      - multiplayer select

                      - volume control
                      - channel selector
                      - smoking instructions?

                      I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                      sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS This user is from outside of this forum
                      sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS This user is from outside of this forum
                      sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtf
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #76

                      @alice Boob wash 🤭

                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                        @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

                        @Sassinake

                        perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                        perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                        perrin42@mastodon.social
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #77

                        @alice @benroyce @Sassinake

                        OMG, that is so bad. 🤣🤣🤣

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                          @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

                          @Sassinake

                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                          benroyce@mastodon.social
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #78

                          @alice @Sassinake

                          i don't know that brand...

                          ohhh

                          😵‍💫

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                            This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                            - boob wash
                            - water-park ride
                            - options menu
                            - multiplayer select

                            - volume control
                            - channel selector
                            - smoking instructions?

                            I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                            diz@thegayagenda.fansD This user is from outside of this forum
                            diz@thegayagenda.fansD This user is from outside of this forum
                            diz@thegayagenda.fans
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #79

                            @alice@lgbtqia.space woozy hamburger menu ​​

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtf

                              @alice Boob wash 🤭

                              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                              alice@lgbtqia.space
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #80

                              @SleepyCatten tell me that's not the motorboat button 🤷🏼‍♀️

                              sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

                                @Sassinake

                                jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                jrdepriest@infosec.exchange
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #81

                                @alice @benroyce @Sassinake

                                At a hemorrhoid haver, I feel this one.

                                We buy wet wipes in bulk.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                                  @Sassinake @alice

                                  i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

                                  they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

                                  toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

                                  while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

                                  but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

                                  sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  sandorspruit@mastodon.nl
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #82

                                  @benroyce @Sassinake @alice Euh, I am going to regret asking this but, euh, what’s a Dutch poop shelf? 🤔😬

                                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                    This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                                    - boob wash
                                    - water-park ride
                                    - options menu
                                    - multiplayer select

                                    - volume control
                                    - channel selector
                                    - smoking instructions?

                                    I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                                    joe@toot.worksJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                    joe@toot.worksJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                    joe@toot.works
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #83

                                    @alice I used a bidet in a random burger place that had "Stop button doesn't work. Flush to stop." written in english above the controls. It makes me wonder what happened before they printed that label.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                      alice@lgbtqia.space
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #84

                                      @1000millimeter the boob wash is for everyone with a butt, and the water park is for vagina-owners.

                                      @mercurial

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS sandorspruit@mastodon.nl

                                        @benroyce @Sassinake @alice Euh, I am going to regret asking this but, euh, what’s a Dutch poop shelf? 🤔😬

                                        benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                        benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                        benroyce@mastodon.social
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #85

                                        @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

                                        people would want to look at their poop for health reasons. so you poop on a shelf in the bowl for inspection

                                        it's fading away, it's mostly historical and a curiousity nowadays in old houses. new builds in the netherlands don't have it. and it's not unique to the netherlands

                                        sassinake@mastodon.socialS alice@lgbtqia.spaceA morton@kolektiva.socialM 3 Replies Last reply
                                        0
                                        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                          This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                                          - boob wash
                                          - water-park ride
                                          - options menu
                                          - multiplayer select

                                          - volume control
                                          - channel selector
                                          - smoking instructions?

                                          I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                                          simonwilliamson@mastodon.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                          simonwilliamson@mastodon.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                          simonwilliamson@mastodon.world
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #86

                                          @alice the third one looks like a fountain riding function, the next one a road (in case you want to go for a drive) and the last is for when you want to see a ghost.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          0
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