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  3. This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

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  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

    @achim I just swear a lot at the wall box.

    achim@mastodon.weindl.bizA This user is from outside of this forum
    achim@mastodon.weindl.bizA This user is from outside of this forum
    achim@mastodon.weindl.biz
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #71

    @alice

    Ah, the John Spartan method 🙃

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

      This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

      - boob wash
      - water-park ride
      - options menu
      - multiplayer select

      - volume control
      - channel selector
      - smoking instructions?

      I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

      katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
      katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
      katzenberger@tldr.nettime.org
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #72

      @alice

      There must be a reason why you stayed silent about the Toto football bets button?

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

        This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

        - boob wash
        - water-park ride
        - options menu
        - multiplayer select

        - volume control
        - channel selector
        - smoking instructions?

        I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

        gimulnautti@mastodon.greenG This user is from outside of this forum
        gimulnautti@mastodon.greenG This user is from outside of this forum
        gimulnautti@mastodon.green
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #73

        @alice Japanese toilets 😊

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

          @alice

          Well, my disgust/apprehension is moot anyway.

          We don't have them in Canada, and it doesn't look like I'll be travelling anytime soon...

          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
          benroyce@mastodon.social
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #74

          @Sassinake @alice

          i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

          they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

          toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

          while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

          but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS space_burger_steve@mstdn.caS gentlemantech@cyberplace.socialG samanthajanesmith@lgbtqia.spaceS 5 Replies Last reply
          0
          • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

            @Sassinake @alice

            i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

            they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

            toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

            while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

            but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

            alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
            alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
            alice@lgbtqia.space
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #75

            @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

            @Sassinake

            perrin42@mastodon.socialP benroyce@mastodon.socialB jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ colesstreetpothole@weatherishappening.networkC 4 Replies Last reply
            0
            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

              This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

              - boob wash
              - water-park ride
              - options menu
              - multiplayer select

              - volume control
              - channel selector
              - smoking instructions?

              I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

              sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS This user is from outside of this forum
              sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS This user is from outside of this forum
              sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtf
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #76

              @alice Boob wash 🤭

              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

                @Sassinake

                perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                perrin42@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                perrin42@mastodon.social
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #77

                @alice @benroyce @Sassinake

                OMG, that is so bad. 🤣🤣🤣

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                  @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

                  @Sassinake

                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                  benroyce@mastodon.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #78

                  @alice @Sassinake

                  i don't know that brand...

                  ohhh

                  😵‍💫

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                    This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                    - boob wash
                    - water-park ride
                    - options menu
                    - multiplayer select

                    - volume control
                    - channel selector
                    - smoking instructions?

                    I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                    diz@thegayagenda.fansD This user is from outside of this forum
                    diz@thegayagenda.fansD This user is from outside of this forum
                    diz@thegayagenda.fans
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #79

                    @alice@lgbtqia.space woozy hamburger menu ​​

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtf

                      @alice Boob wash 🤭

                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                      alice@lgbtqia.space
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #80

                      @SleepyCatten tell me that's not the motorboat button 🤷🏼‍♀️

                      sleepycatten@cultofshiv.wtfS 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                        @benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.

                        @Sassinake

                        jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ This user is from outside of this forum
                        jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ This user is from outside of this forum
                        jrdepriest@infosec.exchange
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #81

                        @alice @benroyce @Sassinake

                        At a hemorrhoid haver, I feel this one.

                        We buy wet wipes in bulk.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                          @Sassinake @alice

                          i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity

                          they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience

                          toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?

                          while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums

                          but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf

                          sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS This user is from outside of this forum
                          sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS This user is from outside of this forum
                          sandorspruit@mastodon.nl
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #82

                          @benroyce @Sassinake @alice Euh, I am going to regret asking this but, euh, what’s a Dutch poop shelf? 🤔😬

                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                            This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                            - boob wash
                            - water-park ride
                            - options menu
                            - multiplayer select

                            - volume control
                            - channel selector
                            - smoking instructions?

                            I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                            joe@toot.worksJ This user is from outside of this forum
                            joe@toot.worksJ This user is from outside of this forum
                            joe@toot.works
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #83

                            @alice I used a bidet in a random burger place that had "Stop button doesn't work. Flush to stop." written in english above the controls. It makes me wonder what happened before they printed that label.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                              alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                              alice@lgbtqia.space
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #84

                              @1000millimeter the boob wash is for everyone with a butt, and the water park is for vagina-owners.

                              @mercurial

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • sandorspruit@mastodon.nlS sandorspruit@mastodon.nl

                                @benroyce @Sassinake @alice Euh, I am going to regret asking this but, euh, what’s a Dutch poop shelf? 🤔😬

                                benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                benroyce@mastodon.social
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #85

                                @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

                                people would want to look at their poop for health reasons. so you poop on a shelf in the bowl for inspection

                                it's fading away, it's mostly historical and a curiousity nowadays in old houses. new builds in the netherlands don't have it. and it's not unique to the netherlands

                                sassinake@mastodon.socialS alice@lgbtqia.spaceA morton@kolektiva.socialM 3 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                  This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                                  - boob wash
                                  - water-park ride
                                  - options menu
                                  - multiplayer select

                                  - volume control
                                  - channel selector
                                  - smoking instructions?

                                  I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                                  simonwilliamson@mastodon.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  simonwilliamson@mastodon.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  simonwilliamson@mastodon.world
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #86

                                  @alice the third one looks like a fountain riding function, the next one a road (in case you want to go for a drive) and the last is for when you want to see a ghost.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                    This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                                    - boob wash
                                    - water-park ride
                                    - options menu
                                    - multiplayer select

                                    - volume control
                                    - channel selector
                                    - smoking instructions?

                                    I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                                    th@social.v.stT This user is from outside of this forum
                                    th@social.v.stT This user is from outside of this forum
                                    th@social.v.st
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #87

                                    @alice we added a label after a friend spent several minutes trying to turn off the water park ride

                                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA msbellows@c.imM 2 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                      This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                                      - boob wash
                                      - water-park ride
                                      - options menu
                                      - multiplayer select

                                      - volume control
                                      - channel selector
                                      - smoking instructions?

                                      I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                                      iwillyeah@mastodon.ieI This user is from outside of this forum
                                      iwillyeah@mastodon.ieI This user is from outside of this forum
                                      iwillyeah@mastodon.ie
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #88

                                      @alice what happens you page the dude on the right? Or is that the button for buttplug installation?

                                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alice@lgbtqia.space
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #89

                                        @cynthiarose I read your reply, and for a brief moment was like "mine was a joke. That has to be a joke...right? Do half of men really wipe that hard with cheap toilet paper?"

                                        💁🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ (I can be dense sometimes)

                                        @benroyce @Sassinake

                                        benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                                          @sandorspruit @Sassinake @alice

                                          people would want to look at their poop for health reasons. so you poop on a shelf in the bowl for inspection

                                          it's fading away, it's mostly historical and a curiousity nowadays in old houses. new builds in the netherlands don't have it. and it's not unique to the netherlands

                                          sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                          sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                          sassinake@mastodon.social
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #90

                                          @benroyce @sandorspruit @alice

                                          (why did I have to put my 2c in?)

                                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 2 Replies Last reply
                                          0
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