This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...
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@alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
real men give themselves anal fissures!
show the poop who is boss!
if you're not wiping with sandpaper quality toilet paper you're WEAK!
(/s)
🥴
@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
I use steel wool.
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@benroyce bidets are great, but if you don't have one, I recommend that fancy toilet paper that turns red when you've wiped enough.
@alice @benroyce @Sassinake I am in Canada right now and can report every toilet in my sister's house has a bidet feature (Tushy brand).
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But the alternative is worse:
Where guys talk themselves into thinking touching anywhere 'around there' is 'gay', so they don't wipe - or wash - their asses.
like... AT ALL.
@Sassinake @alice @cynthiarose
just MAGA toilet habits
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@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
I use steel wool.
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But the alternative is worse:
Where guys talk themselves into thinking touching anywhere 'around there' is 'gay', so they don't wipe - or wash - their asses.
like... AT ALL.
@Sassinake my straight and bi girlfriends have told me horror stories. I've been lucky; all the guys I've been with have been amenable to wiping.
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@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
I use steel wool.
@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
To keep it clean and reuse it I soak it in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice.
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@alice @benroyce @Sassinake I am in Canada right now and can report every toilet in my sister's house has a bidet feature (Tushy brand).
@ColesStreetPothole @alice @benroyce
yeah, I doubt we live in the same Class.
i remember visiting with some Français and they had them imported and installed in their nice house in Outremont.
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@sandorspruit @alice @benroyce
I mean... feces are a good indicator for health...
@Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice @benroyce I think they mainly were checking for worms.
Really.
(And no, this is not a Diet of Worms joke. I'm more mature than that.)
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@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
To keep it clean and reuse it I soak it in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice.
@Perrin42 @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
okay okay calm down
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@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
To keep it clean and reuse it I soak it in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice.
@Perrin42 I've heard tobasco adds a nice finish to it.
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@alice we added a label after a friend spent several minutes trying to turn off the water park ride
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This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...
- boob wash
- water-park ride
- options menu
- multiplayer select- volume control
- channel selector
- smoking instructions?I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.
@alice
It's nice to see modern appliances promoting 80s band Toto
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@Perrin42 @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
okay okay calm down
@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
It's hard to be calm when you wipe your behind with steel wool soaked in rubbing alcohol and lemon juice. It's also very hard to sit comfortably.
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@benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
I use steel wool.
@Perrin42 @benroyce @alice @cynthiarose @Sassinake
Camopaper
️: Toilet paper for men! It's tactical! -
@Perrin42 I've heard tobasco adds a nice finish to it.
@alice @benroyce @cynthiarose @Sassinake
Ooh, I'll have to try that. I've seen what tobasco sauce does to old pennies.
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@Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice @benroyce I think they mainly were checking for worms.
Really.
(And no, this is not a Diet of Worms joke. I'm more mature than that.)
@msbellows @Sassinake @sandorspruit @alice
absolutely
it's hard for the modern mind to contemplate the kinds of shit (pun intended) our ancestors had to go through that we are completely oblivious too
it's why there is so many antivax people. they are embarrassingly unaware as to why it's so important and what they're risking. their ancestors would hit them over the head with a frying pan if they heard that antivax shit, they were acutely aware of what a godsend vaccinations are
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@msbellows the water park is for people with ponytails, the boob-wash is gender neutral.
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@alice
I am not flooding my bits with anything coming OUT of the loo.Nope.
@Sassinake @alice A bidet is a bidet, and a toilet is a toilet. If you don't have room in the bathroom for a bidet, you install a bidet ta. I have a bidetta.
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@alice @benroyce @Sassinake Ooh, I see. Nice idea right, inspect the goods before you flush them.
@sandorspruit @alice @benroyce @Sassinake its like...none of you have ibs hahahaha
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i don't know about canada, but in the usa bidets are having an uptick in popularity
they leave you cleaner than toilet paper, and it's a better experience
toilet paper is never going away. i wouldn't use a bidet in a public rest room, that's for damn sure. but at home?
while europe/ japan/ etc looks with confusion and befuddlement at our in-sink garbage disposal, they're walking around with cleaner bums
but let's not get into the dutch poop shelf
@benroyce @Sassinake @alice Um, we totally have bidets in Canada. I've never seen one in the wild, but Canadian stores sell them, they're not outlawed or anything. I've noticed the uptick in popularity too, but I haven't seen any hard data on how much of that is American vs Canadian. Sassinake, please don't try to make anal hydrophobia an identifying trait for Canadians, we don't need that kind of reputation.
But I don't mind if you want to say that's how it is in Saskatchewan, or whatever*.*Please interpret this as friendly, jocular ribbing, I don't actually want to beef.
