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  3. This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

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  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

    This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

    - boob wash
    - water-park ride
    - options menu
    - multiplayer select

    - volume control
    - channel selector
    - smoking instructions?

    I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

    autisticplushy@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
    autisticplushy@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
    autisticplushy@lgbtqia.space
    wrote sidst redigeret af
    #54

    @alice japanese style wash

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
      alice@lgbtqia.space
      wrote sidst redigeret af
      #55

      @AnachronistJohn it's Beth McCarthy's "Hot and Stupid" cover art.

      They're one of my favorite artists.

      @lukeharby

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
        alice@lgbtqia.space
        wrote sidst redigeret af
        #56

        @achim I just swear a lot at the wall box.

        achim@mastodon.weindl.bizA 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
          alice@lgbtqia.space
          wrote sidst redigeret af
          #57

          @aizuchi "Wipe Out"

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • acb@mastodon.socialA acb@mastodon.social

            @alice Doesn’t the smoking button control the degree of extension of a thing sort of like the toilet equivalent of the Xenomorph’s secondary mouth in Alien, only for nether-parts water spraying?

            alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
            alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
            alice@lgbtqia.space
            wrote sidst redigeret af
            #58

            @acb either that, or it's IKEA-style instructions for a magic wand.

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

              @enbypirate not yet, but I'm sure I will in the end.

              bcasiello@floss.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
              bcasiello@floss.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
              bcasiello@floss.social
              wrote sidst redigeret af
              #59

              @enbypirate @alice So to speak.

              dacmot@sunny.gardenD 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

                @alice
                I am not flooding my bits with anything coming OUT of the loo.

                Nope.

                alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                alice@lgbtqia.space
                wrote sidst redigeret af
                #60

                @Sassinake they use clean water from a separate spout, it's not like a geyser of used toilet water 😂

                sassinake@mastodon.socialS 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                  @Sassinake they use clean water from a separate spout, it's not like a geyser of used toilet water 😂

                  sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                  sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                  sassinake@mastodon.social
                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                  #61

                  @alice

                  but what if someone shits on the spout? How clean can it be?

                  alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • lispi314@udongein.xyzL lispi314@udongein.xyz
                    @alice @lukeharby Some of them are an entirely separate showerhead-looking thing on a flexible hose hung on a hook near the wall and likewise simply connected to water mains.
                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                    alice@lgbtqia.space
                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                    #62

                    @lispi314 never used one like that before, but I have an after-market add-on one on my toilet at home, and it's lovely (except in winter when it literally freezes your bits off, but it's a better wake-me-up than espresso).

                    @lukeharby

                    lispi314@udongein.xyzL 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                      This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                      - boob wash
                      - water-park ride
                      - options menu
                      - multiplayer select

                      - volume control
                      - channel selector
                      - smoking instructions?

                      I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                      E This user is from outside of this forum
                      E This user is from outside of this forum
                      esoteric_programmer@social.stealthy.club
                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                      #63

                      @alice multiplayer what? hang on, that means it can be controlled by multiple people at the same time?

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • sassinake@mastodon.socialS sassinake@mastodon.social

                        @alice

                        but what if someone shits on the spout? How clean can it be?

                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                        alice@lgbtqia.space
                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                        #64

                        @Sassinake you'd have to be a gymnast to do that, plus all the ones I've used are self-washing, and some retract completely until you're ready to use them.

                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                          This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                          - boob wash
                          - water-park ride
                          - options menu
                          - multiplayer select

                          - volume control
                          - channel selector
                          - smoking instructions?

                          I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                          benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                          benroyce@mastodon.social
                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                          #65

                          @alice

                          "options menu"

                          common error

                          if you look carefully the button clearly indicates "contemplate the passage of time on the timescale of geological layers." the button means you want to be undisturbed for a bit

                          which is what we do while sitting on the toilet

                          or at least i do, don't call me out

                          isn't this the root behavior and linguistic source of the word "analysis"?

                          🤭

                          viq@social.hackerspace.plV acb@mastodon.socialA 2 Replies Last reply
                          0
                          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                            @Sassinake you'd have to be a gymnast to do that, plus all the ones I've used are self-washing, and some retract completely until you're ready to use them.

                            alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                            alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                            alice@lgbtqia.space
                            wrote sidst redigeret af
                            #66

                            @Sassinake I wouldn't drink out of it like a water fountain, but it's cleaner than most butts are after pooping 💁🏼‍♀️

                            sassinake@mastodon.socialS 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • benroyce@mastodon.socialB benroyce@mastodon.social

                              @alice

                              "options menu"

                              common error

                              if you look carefully the button clearly indicates "contemplate the passage of time on the timescale of geological layers." the button means you want to be undisturbed for a bit

                              which is what we do while sitting on the toilet

                              or at least i do, don't call me out

                              isn't this the root behavior and linguistic source of the word "analysis"?

                              🤭

                              viq@social.hackerspace.plV This user is from outside of this forum
                              viq@social.hackerspace.plV This user is from outside of this forum
                              viq@social.hackerspace.pl
                              wrote sidst redigeret af
                              #67

                              @benroyce
                              "While contributing to creation of said layers" 😂
                              @alice

                              benroyce@mastodon.socialB 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                @Sassinake I wouldn't drink out of it like a water fountain, but it's cleaner than most butts are after pooping 💁🏼‍♀️

                                sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                sassinake@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                sassinake@mastodon.social
                                wrote sidst redigeret af
                                #68

                                @alice

                                Well, my disgust/apprehension is moot anyway.

                                We don't have them in Canada, and it doesn't look like I'll be travelling anytime soon...

                                benroyce@mastodon.socialB endlessmason@hachyderm.ioE 2 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • viq@social.hackerspace.plV viq@social.hackerspace.pl

                                  @benroyce
                                  "While contributing to creation of said layers" 😂
                                  @alice

                                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                  benroyce@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                  benroyce@mastodon.social
                                  wrote sidst redigeret af
                                  #69

                                  @viq @alice

                                  just a little archeological contribution

                                  🤭

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                    @lispi314 never used one like that before, but I have an after-market add-on one on my toilet at home, and it's lovely (except in winter when it literally freezes your bits off, but it's a better wake-me-up than espresso).

                                    @lukeharby

                                    lispi314@udongein.xyzL This user is from outside of this forum
                                    lispi314@udongein.xyzL This user is from outside of this forum
                                    lispi314@udongein.xyz
                                    wrote sidst redigeret af
                                    #70

                                    @alice@lgbtqia.space @lukeharby@infosec.exchange In my country, cold mains water is a basic fact of winter, so I got myself one that also had a hot water hookup.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                      @achim I just swear a lot at the wall box.

                                      achim@mastodon.weindl.bizA This user is from outside of this forum
                                      achim@mastodon.weindl.bizA This user is from outside of this forum
                                      achim@mastodon.weindl.biz
                                      wrote sidst redigeret af
                                      #71

                                      @alice

                                      Ah, the John Spartan method 🙃

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                        This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                                        - boob wash
                                        - water-park ride
                                        - options menu
                                        - multiplayer select

                                        - volume control
                                        - channel selector
                                        - smoking instructions?

                                        I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                                        katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
                                        katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
                                        katzenberger@tldr.nettime.org
                                        wrote sidst redigeret af
                                        #72

                                        @alice

                                        There must be a reason why you stayed silent about the Toto football bets button?

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                          This bidet remote on the wall of the house in the woods I'm staying at has some bizarre controls...

                                          - boob wash
                                          - water-park ride
                                          - options menu
                                          - multiplayer select

                                          - volume control
                                          - channel selector
                                          - smoking instructions?

                                          I tried the boob wash and was not disappointed, but it took me like two minutes to figure out the little square LED on the left was the off-button.

                                          gimulnautti@mastodon.greenG This user is from outside of this forum
                                          gimulnautti@mastodon.greenG This user is from outside of this forum
                                          gimulnautti@mastodon.green
                                          wrote sidst redigeret af
                                          #73

                                          @alice Japanese toilets 😊

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          0
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